Another Day-Another Dollar

What's Going Right

2012-01-17T18:07:00.000-08:00

Sambo helping me make dinner for some friends. He loves to cook and is getting to be legitimately helpful.

Buddy at the Children's Museum in Reno. He loves science and will soak up anything anyone is willing to teach him.

This afternoon I've been working on updating our adoption profile online. As I've been writing and choosing new photos and basically bragging up our family so a potential birthmother will become interested us, I started feeling really good about myself and all the "wonderful" things going for us as parents.

Then I remembered a few things I've read online lately and wondered why I don't focus more on what's going right in life (especially my parenting). First of all, I read a fable the other day with the moral that "whatever you feed lives." So if you feed jealousy toward others, you'll be jealous. If you feed anger, you'll be angry. If you feed gratitude, you'll feel grateful (and happy). I also read a post online about what people feel they are doing right as a parent. The intention was to make a list of things you are doing well, and continue those in 2012 rather than feel bogged down by all the things you wish you were doing. Taking the previous moral into consideration, focusing on your successes feeds more success.

Here's what I'm doing right as a parent:

Teaching my children to do daily service.
Teaching my children to work hard.
Teaching my children to love to read, the value of learning, and formal education.

What are you doing right as a parent?

Baptism Report

2012-01-10T13:00:00.000-08:00

This is old news, I guess. But I still want to post some pictures and tell all about Buddy's baptism on December 3, 2011. I've been putting it off a little because I honestly don't know what to say to articulate how great it was.

Leading up to the baptism we were all a little stressed. The baptism fell right in the middle of a bunch of other parties and birthdays, but we wanted to make it special. We were hoping that Buddy's birthmom would be able to come. Buddy was really stressed and anxious for months leading up to it. And then there is the typical pressure of having your firstborn grow up (already!). We hoped we had done our best to teach him and that he was prepared.

Am I so lucky to have such handsome boys in my life?

As we hoped, the entire weekend was perfect. Buddy's birthmom and her family came and had a wonderful time. Buddy was happy and calm. The baptism service was amazing. And the party afterward was fun. The weekend was a slice of heaven.

This picture makes me very happy.

Here are some of the miracles of the baptism:

We were overjoyed to see so many of Buddy's "weak things" become strengths. So many friends and family members and ward members and our bishop showed their love as his baptism approached. So many people when way above and beyond their duties to help him. I realized how much people enjoy helping someone who feels vulnerable. So often we think we need to appear "perfect" or "all together" but this was a great example of a kid who was overwhelmed and the overwhelming love that was shown to him as a result. And what a difference it made!

Another thing that has been cool, but not really surprising, is the huge growth that has come to him since his baptism. He is much more responsible and compliant and a lot more emotionally mature than he was two months ago. His behavior has been pretty darn near perfect. Isn't that a mother's dream? An obedient child! Yay! Buddy is the type of kid that needs a purpose and a responsibility. The two times in his life when he's been the easiest to parent have been now (coming off the high of the baptism) and right after Sambo was born (when he felt responsible for caring for his baby).

Buddy's birthmom and her daughter. Wonderful people like them make my life so very full.

Every time we visit with Buddy's birthmom I feel the same way and say the same things. But man, oh man. Those two have a lot in common. We loved having her with us. She was so grateful to be here and had so many good insights into the baptism and our relationship. While I try to articulate to people the special love that they have for each other, I just can't do it. Things are not and have never been easy for her. She made such a hard choice to place Buddy with us. But she said that having an open adoption doesn't make things easier for her, just better. So beautiful. She came to church with us on Sunday and bore her testimony. I was so impressed and Buddy was beaming. He was so proud of her. I think everyone in attendance was proud.

The baptism service itself. We considered having a very pared down service only doing the ordinances and no talks. But after some prayer and careful thought, Buddy chose people he loves to do the music and talks. He called them and asked them to help. So cute. Everyone that spoke, prayed, and did the music did such a good job. Really amazing job, actually. G and I and his birthfamily spent most of the service in tears. I'm not sure about anybody else because I was so focused on the moment. I wanted to really remember the moment so when life gets hard for Buddy, I can remind him of the love we all felt that day.

G did such a good job. I'm so thankful he honors his priesthood. This can not be overstated. So, so thankful.

Noah's birthmom's daughter. Such a princess. We adore her.

Happy Birthday to Me and Random Thoughts

2012-01-05T20:36:00.000-08:00

This is how G spent my birthday party/Christmas Eve

I turned 35. It was the worst birthday I've ever had. I'm not trying to be dramatic, I'm just explaining it how it was. Considering I've been royally spoiled on 34 other birthdays, I guess I was due for a lame one. Here are a few reasons it wasn't fun. I've been annoyed about getting older. I embraced 30. 35 has been a downer, though. First of all, it's the last big milestone before "over the hill." Plus medically it's a biggie too. Life insurance premiums increase after 35. Thank goodness I got some at age 34.9. And fertility decreases. Since I have no fertility in the first place, this frustrates me. a lot. My hair is going gray which is SO ANNOYING too. And don't even get me started on hormones and muffin tops. TMI all the way around.

The other reason my birthday wasn't fun was because I spent the previous several days with a cold and was up all night the night before my birthday with a screaming sinus headache. We were staying in a hotel in Reno, and the sound of G sleeping was making my headache hurt worse. I didn't have anywhere to go being in a hotel and all, so I got up and moved to Sambo's bed where I endured him kicking me in the kidneys all night.

By the time morning came, we were all exhausted. Nobody had slept. G went down to the hotel's breakfast and brought me a bagel in bed. The day went south from there. G suddenly came down with stomach flu and everyone knows the stomach flu trumps all other viruses and birthdays. So I was up a creek, so to speak. All birthday plans canceled (including my MUCH anticipated lunch to Grimaldis). Laying in bed all day canceled. Taking a day off from being in charge of the kids canceled.

So although I was feeling like death, I showered and vacated the hotel room so G could be sick in peace. I wasn't in any state to do anything fun or travel too far, so I took the boys over to Del Taco, which was just outside the door of the hotel. During lunch Buddy remarked, "This is just a little worse than Taco Bell." "A lot worse," I corrected. It tasted awful. (As a side note, it was so awful, I can also no longer eat Taco Bell, which used to be my favorite.)

We then went to McDonalds to pick up a sprite for G and to buy some more advil for my head. We returned to the room to drop off the sprite and to pick up some reading material. The boys and I then sat in the hotel lobby for the next 90 minutes giving G more time to get all his sick out. Thank heavens the boys were cooperative and quiet. And even better was the fact that the hotel was a ghost town, it being Christmas Eve and all.

By then I was overdue for a nap, so we went back to the room and put the kids back in front of the TV. Sometime during that nap G's sister awesomely came and picked the boys up from the hotel and took them over to their house to eat dinner and play. I woke up feeling a bit better, so I had a lovely birthday dinner at McDonalds. Eventually we headed over to the house to spend a little time celebrating Christmas Eve and eating chocolate birthday cake.

I'm sure you feel so sorry for me.

You don't really need to. It wasn't that bad. (At least I didn't have the stomach flu.)

I'm working on composing some posts to talk about Buddy's baptism and to share some Christmas pictures. But before I do that, here's a few other not-interesting things that have been happening.

I can't stand that school started up again. I REALLY WISH IT WAS STILL CHRISTMAS BREAK. School started yesterday.

Sambo called me stupid today. It's amazing how much less stuff like that bothers me with my second child.

Speaking of Sambo... each day that passes he gets more and more of a handful. He used to be so easy. It's so weird how his personality has totally blossomed in the last few months. I still ADORE him, though. Even if he thinks I'm stupid, I think he's hilarious and clever. It's really interesting because four years old was Buddy's easiest age and it's turning out to be Sambo's hardest by a long shot. These kids couldn't be more different.

I have one more party (a dinner for all the primary presidents in the stake) at my house next week and then I'm closing my door and not allowing anyone to enter for three months. Just kidding... but it's tempting. I'm really tired of parties.

I have done very little this week and it's been fantastic. I took two naps on Monday. On Tuesday I did a bunch of laundry and folded it all and put it away that day. That has literally never happened since I've lived in this house. I went to the gym three days in a row and worked myself hard all three times. I had to take today off because I am so awesomely sore. I love, love, love pilates and my weights class. If I didn't have them I'd have to be heavily medicated. Oh, speaking of which. G's work is no longer paying for half of our gym membership. I'm disappointed, but I'm willing to pay the full amount because I love/need it. I've spent the rest of the week laying around, sitting around, staring at the wall, watching TV, reading, catching up on blogs, and surfing the Internet. Do you do Pinterest yet? What about GoodreadsAhhhh. I think I'm going to spend 2012 lazy.

Which leads me to my next point. I have never in my life made a New Year's Resolution. But I did this year. Drumroll.... I'm going to find the best pizza in Portland. Did you expect me to have a worthy goal? Why would I when I just decided I'm going to spend 2012 lazy.

Buddy started piano lessons on Tuesday. He has impressed me and warmed my heart on multiple occasions in his little life, but that first lesson rose up near the top of times I've loved him a lot. He was incredibly focused and took it super seriously. And he has a natural talent I can tell already. Reading the music seemed second nature. A-DORABLE. I'm not counting my chickens before they hatch, but he is loving practicing so far (twice). His teacher is fantastic. She is one of my favorite ward members, so I'm thrilled she's his teacher. I'm not sure how old she is, but she got married in 1944. So if she married at 20, then she'd be pushing 88 years old. She's been teaching piano for 60 years!

I instituted a new procedure for Buddy after school. I make him a list of things I'd like him to accomplish that day and then I also list possible privileges he might earn if he finishes his entire list (watch a movie, make cookies, do a science experiment). He can do the list or not, it's his choice. I hate begging him or negotiating with him and with the added responsibilities of scouts and piano and soon track plus the usual chores, homework, and reading -- I can't micromanage his after school routine. Plus I'm working on being lazy. So far (twice) it's worked brilliantly.

Hope Your Christmas was Merry

2011-12-27T23:58:00.000-08:00

Scene: Getting ready for bed Christmas Eve.

Me: Buddy, if you don't cooperate, Santa isn't going to bring you any presents.

Buddy: That's fine. Because if he brings me coal, I'll use it to make a fire which will burn the house down and then I'll be on the Naughty List next year too.

Me: Well, fine. Perhaps you better stay on on his Good List.

* * *

Despite an outbreak of the cold virus and the stomach flu, Santa still came and we had a nice Christmas. Many more exciting details of Christmas vacation to come.

Happy Birthday M!

2011-12-24T11:41:00.000-08:00

Today is M's birthday. She is 35, but still looks like she's in her 20s or even teens. The world is a better place because she was born. She has touched many lives and is a wonderful, wife, friend, and mother. Me and the boys have come to realize that we couldn't function without her. Despite having a nasty cold and spending her birthday in a hotel, we hope that it will be a good one. We love you.

M's Christmas Talk

2011-12-19T22:14:00.000-08:00

This picture is courtesy of www.lds.org

Despite her arguments to the contrary, M is truly one of the greatest people I have ever known. I wonder many times why she decided to marry me. Amongst her many talents, one of her gifts is to write and deliver moving talks in Church. She spoke last Sunday on the topic of "Keeping Christ at the center of Christmas." Because she did such an amazing job, I think it should be shared. Here is the text of her talk:

Christmas

Between Thanksgiving and Christmas every year our family has had a lot going on. We have the usual family life responsibilities, our callings, work, and taking care of the kids, and the four of us all have birthdays within that one-month period. Plus this year we hosted my extended family for a big Thanksgiving feast. This year Noah got baptized, we’ve hosted out of town guests, we’ve gone out of town, we’ve had visits with both boys’ birthmoms, and we’ve hosted several parties.

I assume I’m not alone about being spread thin during December. With big families, music concerts, school finals, job responsibilities, travel plans, shopping, making cards, baking, ward parties to plan or attend, getting everyone to doctor because your deductible has been met, decorating, tithing settlements, and I KNOW everyone’s callings are busy at the end of the year… I could go on for hours listing all the things we NEED to do before Christmas. Yet most of them really have nothing to do with Christ.

In Elder Uchtdorf’s Christmas devotional this year, he compared the Christmas season to a game of Jenga. If one part of what we perceive as a piece to the perfect season gets misplaced, the whole holiday falls apart. But we must remember that the season is already perfect. We are celebrating Heavenly Father’s supreme gift to us, that of the birth of our Savior.

So how can we open our hearts to Christ during December? Rather than doing more traditions to invite the Christmas spirit, perhaps we should do fewer.

We can most effectively invite the spirit of Christmas by following the examples of those who saw the baby Jesus with their own eyes. I love the article in this month’s Ensign by Elder Patrick Kearon. He shares lessons we should learn from the shepherds, Simeon, Anna, and the wise men.

Elder Kearon says we must respond with haste, like the shepherds, whenever the spirit speaks to us. Thomas S. Monson said we must, “never, never, never postpone following a prompting.”

Simeon was promised he would not die until he saw Christ. He was prompted to go to the temple the day that Mary and Joseph brought baby Jesus to present him to the Lord at the temple. Elder Kearon says, we should follow the Holy Ghost so our lives can follow the path Heavenly Father has for us. Simeon was in the right place at the right time to receive the blessings the Lord had promised him.

Anna was a “prophetess” who spent a lot of her time in the temple as well. She also held the baby Jesus in the temple. We can follow her example of a lifetime of prayer and fasting and temple attendance.

The Wise Men knew the signs of Jesus’ coming, so when the saw the new star, they prepared their gifts and went to find Him. What gifts are we willing to give the Savior? Are we willing to give our will to Him and to go where He is?

I remember some wonderful Christmases from my childhood. We were a typical middle class family. We never went without, but my parents gifts to us were never extravagant. We had some fantastic traditions though. I remember riding the old train in the top floor of Meier and Frank downtown. I remember Peacock Lane. I remember Santa – in the flesh -- coming to visit to bring us each a small gift to my grandma’s house a week or so before Christmas. I remember my grandma’s cheeseball. And her mouth-watering delicious “snacks,” which was glorified Chex mix.

But the memories and traditions I really treasure was the service my family would provide to others. The two best things my parents exemplified was a life of hard work and daily service. I remember when it was time to bring gifts to the “giving tree” at school, the other kids would bring a gift each and I would bring a sack of presents to give away, all lovingly purchased by my mom. When I was really young I would look around and compare my sack of gifts and wonder why my mom bought so much. I learned over the years that she always gave so much. She always gives away her Christmas bonuses. Any money saved in her change jar was given away. All her spare time was given away too.

John A. Widstoe said, “How can we give to the Lord? What shall we give to him? Every kind word to our own, every help given them, is as a gift to God, whose chief concern is the welfare of his children. Every gentle deed to our neighbor, every kindness to the poor and suffering, is a gift to the Lord, before whom all mankind are equal. Every conformity to the Lord’s plan of salvation—and this is of first importance—is a direct gift to God, for thereby we fit ourselves more nearly for our divinely planned destiny…Do we stand ready to sacrifice for the cause of the Lord in the unpaid services of the Church? That is, are our time, talents, and means at the disposal of those who administer the Lord’s work? Great is the gift from such a hand.”

I have enjoyed this topic and the chance it’s given me to notice the wonderful giving going on around me. 135 Blessing Bags for the homeless, well over 300 children helped by Helping Hands in Sherwood this year, our ward’s Giving Tree, Blankets made for a women’s shelter, to name a few. Last year my brother and his in-laws dressed up like Santa Claus and his elves and hand delivered donated Christmas gifts to families on Christmas day. Have you heard about the anonymous donors paying off layaways at Kmarts around the country? According to a news article 100 layways have been paid off by donors at the Kmarts around the Portland area.

Yesterday Greg and I went to the temple with my parents and my brother and his wife to do sealings for some close relatives. I had never done that before. As we sat in the sealing room, I felt like there was nothing better I could be doing during the Christmas season than giving my relatives the gift of being sealed and all the rights of the gospel that go with that covenant. My grandma Hazel died two months ago and was the source of many of my happy childhood Christmas memories. While her death was too recent to do her temple work this time, it seemed so fitting to seal her parents and all her siblings together during the time of year that reminds me of her most.

For many of us we have spent a Christmas or two in less than ideal circumstances. No children, no spouse, no parents, no money, no home, no time.

I have spent the past few months thinking about the source of my own happiness. I have thought and studied and prayed about how to have joy even during hard times. I have come to know that the source of happiness and peace is the Savior. I know that if we use Him as our source of strength and give to others even when we feel we don’t have anything to give, we will be blessed with abundance.

3 Nephi 12:3 says, “Yea, blessed are the poor in spirit who come until me, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.”

How do we come unto the Savior? Elder Holland says, “[Jesus] is saying to us, “Trust me, learn of me, do what I do. Then, when you walk where I am going,” He says, “we can talk about where you are going, and the problems you face and the troubles you have. If you will follow me, I will lead you out of darkness,” He promises. “I will give you answers to your prayers. I will give you rest to your souls.”

At Christmas-time we increase our focus on giving, love, family, peace, and Jesus Christ. For many of us we feel the Savior’s love more during December because of all we receive. The anonymous gift of cash or treats on the porch helps us feel that the Lord knows our struggles and loves us enough to inspire someone to reach out and help. But whether we feel the Lord’s love or not, his love is there. It is real. He loves us whether we seek his love. He loves us whether we see His love. He has atoned for us already whether we are ready to accept that gift or not. Jesus Christ does not withhold any of his gifts because we aren’t ready or willing. They are there all the time. We must give up our fears, doubts, and anger -- and when we do, we become aware of the love of God that was there all the time.

One of the most powerful stories of faith in the Book of Mormon is the story of the Brother of Jared. He trusted that the Lord in all his power could illuminate the stones to provide light for their barges. Jesus put forth his finger to light the stones and the brother of Jared was able to see him. Now, Jesus would have been there whether the brother of Jared had enough faith to see him or not. In other words, our faith or lack of faith doesn’t change the behavior of Jesus. But the brother of Jared’s faith – and our faith – allows us to see the miracles the Lord performs. Ether 3:9 says, “And the Lord said unto him; Because of thy faith thou has seen that I shall take upon me flesh and blood; and never has man come before me with such exceeding faith as thou hast.”

When Moses and the Israelites were in the wilderness the Lord sent fiery serpents to humble them. When the Israelites got bit Moses told them to look at a brass serpent on a pole. If they did, they would live. Alma 33:20 says, “But few understood the meaning of those things, and this because of the hardness of their hearts. But there were many who were so hardened that they would not look, therefore they perished. Now the reason they would not look is because they did not believe that it would heal them.”

Like the Israelites, Jesus’ atonement has already bought us eternal life. All we must do is look to Him. John 3:14-15 says, “And as Moses lifted up the serpent in the wilderness, even so must the Son of man be lifted up: That whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have eternal life. For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten son that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.”

We can still feel the spirit of Christmas while suffering. In fact, your humility during hard times will bring you even closer to Him. Jesus Christ has already paid the price for your happiness. I know he has for me. Jesus Christ is there. If we learn more about him through scripture study, fasting, and prayer; seek Him out through worship at church and the temple; and focus our energies on service – His love will sink deep into our hearts. And no matter the ups and downs of life, we will always have peace and joy.

Jesus Christ knew his eternal destiny. He knew he would suffer and die for us, yet he didn’t waste his few mortal years worrying, but spent them serving those around him. During this Christmas-time we can ask, if Jesus were on the earth, what gifts would he give. Those are the gifts we can give.

In the year 2000 the First Presidency and Quorum of the Twelve published the “Living Christ: The Testimony of the Apostles.” I love the final paragraph. It says, “We bear testimony, as His duly ordained Apostles—that Jesus is the Living Christ, the immortal Son of God. He is the great King Immanuel, who stands today on the right hand of His Father. He is the light, the life, and the hope of the world. His way is the path that leads to happiness in this life and eternal life in the world to come. God be thanked for the matchless gift of His divine Son.”

This is also my testimony. In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

Surprise!

2011-12-14T21:13:00.000-08:00

The family in front of the fire at the Great Wolf Lodge

Last year we surprised the kids and took them to the Great Wolf Lodge on Sambo's birthday. When Buddy and I were waiting in line for one of the waterslides, Buddy said, "If you ever want to surprise me again, do this." I kept that in mind and decided to plan another surprise. We went again on Sambo's birthday this year and invited my parents, G's parents who were in town for Buddy's baptism, and my brother and his family. Obviously, it was a rip roarin' good time.

Buddy has been eating like a champ for a year hoping he'd grow tall enough to ride the biggest slide. When the nurse measured him at 48 inches at his pediatrician check-up a few weeks ago he shouted, "YES! I can ride the Tornado at Great Wolf Lodge!!!!!" The nurse said he wasn't the first kid to be excited to arrive at 48 inches tall.

However, when the girl at the entrance at GWL measured him, he was probably 1/2 inch too short by their measuring stick. Thank goodness the girl had mercy on him and gave him the "all clear." I have never been so relieved and Buddy was completely overjoyed. We never would have heard the end of the weeping, wailing, and gnashing of teeth had she stuck to the sign's warning that they make "no exceptions" for not meeting height requirements.

Buddy spent the next two days riding slides without stopping. The Lodge was practically empty since we were there on a Monday and Tuesday, which meant there was no waiting in any lines for the slides. Which then meant Buddy climbed the steps repeatedly without stopping the entire time. We all tried to estimate how many steps he climbed or how many slides he rid, but it was too many to count. It was totally unreal how excited he was -- and his stamina for the climbing and the slides was mind-boggling. (Literally. We all got super dizzy trying to keep up with him.) I probably did 25 slides with him and that was plenty. G and his dad and my brother each probably did twice that each. And my dad probably did 3 times that with him. I really regret not putting a pedometer on him. That kid is crazy, I tell you.

A few interesting experiences. G had the whistle blown at him at least 10 times and I had it blown at me once. Then one time Buddy was swimming in the wave pool and the lifeguard thought he was struggling in the water (he wasn't) and jumped in to rescue him. The supervising lifeguard filled out an "incident report" about the whole ordeal. Buddy was mortified and was really shaken up about it. The lifeguards reassured him "they jump in after kids all the time." Then the next day Buddy slipped while running and cracked his head on the ground pretty bad. My brother did a check on him for a concussion and the lifeguards all gathered around with worried looks and ice packs. He turned out to be fine, despite a pretty big lump and bruise. By some miracle, they didn't write another incident report. Thank goodness because I don't think Buddy would have recovered from the humiliation and I don't think I would have recovered from the anxiety of having such a crazy kid.

Sambo taking a little snooze.

Sambo also had a ball. He could only go on the smaller two slides, but he had fun doing those and playing in the wave pool and the kiddie area. He loves playing in the water, so he was in heaven too. And unlike his brother, he actually got tired and fell asleep at one point in G's arms. And he didn't do anything to warrant any incident reports.

It was really fun being there with family and we decided that going with friends or family is the only way to go. There is no way G and I could have kept up with Buddy alone. As for me, I finally got up the courage to ride the Tornado with Buddy. He had been begging me since last year and I finally sucked it up in exchange for him returning to the wave pool (the location of the embarrassing "save" from the lifeguard). I was terrified, but I decided to go twice in a row to try to really overcome my fear. It didn't work! In fact, when we got done Buddy asked me, "Where you really crying, mom?" No I wasn't, but almost. I don't need to fall off cliffs in an inner-tube to give myself that rush everybody likes. I have enough anxiety, stress, and adrenaline in my life. Thank you very much.

Four!

2011-12-10T18:14:00.000-08:00

My baby is Four! Sambo hasn't been a baby in a long time, but I still pretend.

We celebrated at Great Wolf Lodge (more details coming). We also threw him his first "friend" birthday party today. He and his brother share the same friends, so it was especially fun. We had an alien and rocket theme because he loves stuff that flies and is super into aliens. I suggested we invite some "real" aliens and his eyes got especially big and he said, "That's feepy" (creepy). He said the kids would all cry and would want to go home. So we scrapped that idea.

The kids with their rockets.

Instead we encouraged the kids to be creative and build rockets out of craft supplies we provided. The kids did such a great job, especially with G as our creative director. G and I made a good party planning team. I know how to handle kids and he knows how to help kids have a good time. Next we hunted for hidden stars around the house. The kid that won got a starburst. And the kid that found the special "moon" got a starburst. (Get it? starburst?) Then G showed the kids several youtube videos of real rocket launches and landings. They were totally impressed. I don't think Sambo broke his stare at the TV for a solid 10 minutes. He was totally spellbound. Next up was balloon rockets. We filled balloons with some pinto beans, blew the balloons up slightly, taped some streamers to the bottom and we had us some rockets. Then we burned a bit of energy with a few minutes of freeze dance. It's our family's party trademark. We play this at every kid party and I usually play it when I teach preschool. It's so hilarious to watch a pack of kids cut some serious rug. This year the song was the clean version of "E.T." by Katy Perry. So awesome!

Then it was time for presents and then cupcakes. I've said it before and I'll say it again, I abhor making fancy cakes and cupcakes. Why I continue to make an effort is beyond me. I'm pretty sure I will not be doing it again. (Maybe making cupcakes is like giving birth, though. By the time next year rolls around I will have forgotten the pain, agony, and sacrifice involved and I'll agree to do it again. Please someone stop me before I agree to do it again!) This year I attempted alien cupcakes. I did a horrible job, although they still turned out cute, only because the design was awesome and not because of my handiwork.

Then it was pinata time. Sambo has been wanting a birthday party with a pinata for a long time. We got a star pinata because I wasn't on the ball enough to get a cooler alien one online. Amazingly, no one got smacked in the face. I thought for sure it would happen and was relieved it didn't. The parents came just as we were finishing the pinata. We still had a few more activities in reserve if we needed to fill time, including a paper airplane contest (we have the best spot to launch them from upstairs) and making a cratered moon out of paper plates and foil. All in all, it was a super simple party but the kids were busy the whole time and G and I never lost control. Sambo LOVES crafts, so we went heavy on the crafts.

Now for the part of the post where I brag about my totally awesome son. Sambo is the type of kid that makes infertile women grieve. He is a mother's dream. Honestly, he is so easy to parent and is an absolute delight. We love him so much! G and I say he wakes up cuter every day. His very best talent is being cute. He is darling, he talks cute and he has cute interests.

Sambo is very active and runs all around all the time, but he has a very easygoing personality. He rides his bike amazingly well and is a whiz on his scooter. He learned to swim this summer and if we were more on the ball as parents and took him swimming more through the winter, he would probably be really awesome by next summer. His other major talent is the roundhouse he can do while perched in his carseat. I feel really bad for Buddy, but Buddy has yet to learn to move his face away from the range of Sambo's foot. The range on his kick is really impressive, though, so there is probably little Buddy can do to get away from him.

Sambo spends his entire life trying to keep up with his very smart and very active older brother, and he does pretty well. He gets worn out much quicker than Buddy, but he makes a valiant effort. He loves to be treated like the "big kids" and he actually started hyperventilating at the gym this week when he realized he is old enough to be in the "big kid" room. He begged his brother stay with him so they could play together in that room. He was paralyzed by joy and wouldn't even walk into the room. He just stood there and repeated over and over again, "I play with Yoah? I play with my brother? Me old enough?!!!!!" over and over again.

Sambo with his new alien lego set.

Sambo is very artistic and makes the best drawings and hangs them all over the house. I love this part of motherhood. I love having a gallery of kid drawings taped above my bed and handmade kid ornaments all over the Christmas tree. A month or so ago Sambolegos amazingly well. And his attention span is better than most children twice his age. Last night he sat and quietly built legos with his birthmom for an hour and a half. He would sit and do "homework" with me on the couch all day if I had time to sit with him.

Sambo playing legos with his birthmom.

He is very eager to please and cries really hard when he gets in trouble, especially in public. When he is disciplined he fixes his behavior immediately. He goes days without getting a timeout. I can take him anywhere because he is the rare child that actually cooperates in the store, falls asleep in the car but wakes up happy, rarely gets cranky, and falls asleep every week during church so we don't have to bother to entertain him. We often say that if he had come first (which remember, if he had not been placed for adoption, he would have been...) his parent(s) would have assumed they were the bomb. He makes us feel like we are doing things right! And trust me, that's a good feeling.

Oh, how we love him. It's not right to love somebody because they are good. But we do. And lucky for us, he also is lovable for about a million other reasons. He is such a wonderful son. I have no idea where life will take him, but I hope life treats him good and never sucks the simple joy from him.

Exhaustion -- Part 2

2011-12-01T20:25:00.000-08:00

Photo not taken today. I wish! Taken a few weeks ago. Should I be embarrassed about such awkward photos of myself on the Internet? I'm not.

I'm taking a much-earned break from all my hard work this week to update you on my "to do" list. You would be so proud! I have accomplished many items on my list. Unfortunately, I thought of a bunch more critical items I should have listed, but don't worry, they got done too. This happened mostly because of the fantastic help of friends and family. G is a workhorse and has happily complied with the list, helping a ton. One benefit of having hyper children is they are very good to help. Buddy has always been a great worker and did a great job of vacuuming the garage and the car, cleaning his rooms and doing tons of other odds and ends jobs. Sambo did his fair share too, including being cooperative while I was busy every day. And then my friends. One friend watched Sambo today. A friend went to the store to pick out Buddy's suit. A friend came into my house and folded my laundry pile. A friend sent an email offering support. A friend got all of Buddy's supplies at the Scout store so he would be properly outfitted for his first Pack Meeting. A friend took charge of typing and printing the program for Buddy's baptism. And friends have offered to help make treats for the party after the baptism. I HATE asking for help, and ABHOR taking help. But my tasks this week were non-negotiable and there was no possible way to get everything done without losing my mind. It's yet another lesson that I/you don't need to be a martyr. People are willing to help. They want to! And the reason I know they want to help is because most of these acts of service were taken care of before I even had a chance to ask. Our family has wonderful friends.

And here's something else kind of funny concerning exhaustion. G mentioned yesterday that he's literally never been so tired in all his life. At first we assumed it was because we're busy and our weights class at the gym was particularly hard yesterday. But then we realized we've had turkey for dinner and lunch in one form or another since Thanksgiving. I made a 26.6 pound turkey and we had a lot of leftovers. Tryptophan is catching up to us apparently.

Exhaustion

2011-11-27T21:43:00.000-08:00

Life is good, don't get me wrong. But the past few weeks I've been run ragged. This is always a busy time of year with the normal holiday activities. Plus all four of us have birthdays between Thanksgiving and Christmas. Add in traveling for Christmas, a baptism, out of town guests, visits with both birthmoms, and a bunch of friend and relative birthdays during that same time frame -- and I'm tired.

Here's what I've accomplished already in the last week:

Getting the yard cleaned up for winter.
Buddy's birthday.
Cleaning the house from top to bottom.
Hosting 21 people for Thanksgiving dinner.
Cleaning house after Thanksgiving.
Zoo lights.
Pulling an all-nighter for Black Friday. My first time! So fun!
Cutting down and decorating our Christmas tree.
Date night with G to Breaking Dawn Part One. LAME/GROSS. (the movie, not the date)

Here's what I still need to accomplish in the next week/few weeks:

Fold about 10 loads of laundry sitting on my bedroom floor.
Clean the house from top to bottom to prepare for visitors this week.
Buddy's Baptism.
Make sure Buddy is relaxed about his baptism.
Pay the bills.
Plan and execute some sort of Baptism party.
Host grandparents.
Host Buddy's birthmom and her family.
Sambo's birthday.
Schedule a time to see Sambo's birthmom to celebrate his birthday.
Make a bunch of cakes/cupcakes for all the parties happening.
Get hair cut.
Two days at Great Wolf Lodge.
Mail Christmas cards.
Buy presents. (Most have been bought, thank heavens.)
Wrap Christmas presents.
Deliver packets our friends put together for the homeless.
Teach the kids about giving and service. Find opportunities to give and serve.
Find Buddy a suit.
Get everybody to the doctor/eye doctor since we've met our deductible for the year.
Plan and execute a friend birthday party for Sambo.
Host a Christmas party with our friends.
Hire movers to move a piano to our house.
Get that piano repaired and tuned.
Find a piano teacher for Buddy.
Talk to our accountant.
Iron. OR take G's clothes to the dry cleaners. He officially has NO un-ironed white shirts.
Get life insurance before I turn 35 in a few weeks.
Do everything that needs to be done for my calling.
Schedule adoption trainings for 2012.
Plan something fun for G's birthday.
Get ready to go out of town for Christmas.
Update our adoption profile.
I'm sure I have to teach preschool somewhere soon too.
Get to the gym three times a week since all I do is celebrate people's birthdays.
Make sure all my friends who are sad are OK.
Take care of the kids.

Accountable (updated)

2011-11-21T16:41:00.000-08:00

Well, he's gone and done it. Buddy has officially aged to the wonderful age of 8. It's so hard to believe he's gone from this:

To this:

Every parent says their kids grow too fast but... wow. I didn't know how hard it would be to see my kids grow up. Not that the future isn't exciting and bright for him, but he's officially at the age of accountability and responsibility. I had no idea the absolute terror I would feel about the "world" sucking all that is good out of him. Unfortunately, he will experience sorrow, loneliness, worry, frustration, fear. Nobody wants that for their child. But when it's my child. My heart breaks knowing that life is hard for everyone, and my firstborn son will experience hard times too. I love that my job is to teach, support, and help him. Plus he's quick to forgive, capable, strong, and smart. So between his own abilities and the strength of his many loved ones, he'll be OK. But wow, that's a lot of pressure for a mom! He deserves the very best life has to offer, but as I've been trying to teach him, life isn't "fair." I want him to somehow know how to be happy despite hard times. It's crazy to think he is now responsible for his own happiness.

I had a feeling mothering would be hard -- because everyone tells you that. But they also said sleepless nights and potty-training were what made it so hard. Well, I'm going to publicly say that if that's what you consider "hard," you have easy kids. Buddy worries me, confuses me, exhausts me, and makes me so incredibly happy all in the same day. Nobody tells you that sort of stuff -- the rollercoaster your heart goes on when dealing with regular life.

I'll tell you one thing, my heart practically bursts on a daily basis because of his wonderful personality. He loves deeply, is so patient, loves life, loves everybody, loves God, is curious, and is smart. I'm so happy to be Buddy's mother. I didn't know that parenting would be so much fun -- nobody tells you that either.

I brought him Taco Bell at school for lunch today and enjoyed him whispering in my ear which girls he has a crush on and which girls have a crush on him. He was the last kid still eating so I encouraged him to hurry and eat so he could go to recess. He said, "That's OK. I'm enjoying this more than I'd enjoy recess." It's moments like that that I work for day-in and day-out with my kids. And when they happen -- and with him they happen pretty often -- it's pure bliss.

Buddy is such a gift to our family. But I had a distinct feeling this morning that he is a gift to a lot of families. Two families call him son. Those two families are celebrating his life today. Real life started for those two families when he was born. It's a lot of pressure for kids to be told they are "lucky" they were adopted, so I am going to try to never give him that responsibility to feel lucky. But I do want him to know that he is very blessed and lucky to have so many people that love him.

Not to mention, his wide circle of friends that love him. When I was at the school today I enjoyed being proudly introduced to all his friends. Plus all his friends from church, the neighborhood, and former classes that came and said hi to me too. Nobody told me how awesome that part of parenting is either. Becoming friends with your kids' friends -- so rewarding. Then there was a friend of mine at the school who has taken an interest in him over the past year. Nobody told me that would happen. That my friends would care about my kids? I've never felt so humble and thankful, as I was when I learned that one of my friends has prayed for my son. She saw us having lunch and came to wish him a happy birthday. She sat down next to him, told him she cared about him, that she had his baptism on her calendar and that she was giving him a challenge to bear his testimony at church after his baptism. If he'd do it, she'd do it. They both struggle with anxiety, so her love means a lot to him.

I don't know what I did (wrong or right) to get this job of raising Buddy. What a blessing. I love him with all my heart!

* Our Bishop just called to wish Buddy a happy birthday. How cool is that?!

Also, I most definitely do NOT have my sister's or friends' talents for making cool birthday cakes. I shouldn't even try. Well, to be completely honest, I don't even try. Buddy's birthday cake was an afterthought today. I knew and planned the type of cake, but I didn't have a plan for how to execute it. It turned out horrific at best. Honestly, it was so ridiculous looking, I couldn't stop laughing and should have been totally ashamed of myself. I apologized to Buddy for making it so ugly and he said, "If I was allowed to say 'shut up' I would right now. The cake is fine."

I rest my case about his awesomeness.

Essays

2011-11-14T21:19:00.000-08:00

Buddy is amazing in every way. One of his very best talents is testing my abilities as a parent. I have been trying to consistently do timeouts rather than supplementing with lectures, yelling, or worse. But many of his behaviors that test me the most don't really fall into the "you've just earned a timeout" category.

I have found that if he gets a chance to explain himself, a lot of times he de-escalates. Unfortunately, when I'm irritated I rarely have the patience to sit and listen to his feelings. So along came a brilliant idea. I could have him write essays to explain his behavior and what he could do better.

In the last 6 days, he's written 17 pages worth of essays. He earns a page per infraction that I feel doesn't really warrant a timeout. I make a list of topics I'd like him to cover in each essay. He has to sit on his bed away from the rest of us and write. If he gets off his bed, he gets another page. These essays have become a highlight of my day. I might share a few here on the blog because they are so amusing. The interesting thing is how much I adore him after reading his essays.

Here's today's essay. The topics were: Why I shouldn't get out of my bed. What happens when I don't get enough sleep? Why mom doesn't like it. And What I should do if I'm not tired. He got out of bed three times last night before falling asleep, so he earned 3 pages. I kept his punctuation, but fixed his spelling errors, which are getting fewer and further between which each essay!

Without further adieu:

"I have one essay to write and it will not be fun. So I got out of bed and I don't remember what I was doing while I was out of my bed. And when you don't get enough sleep you get really really really really cranky in the morning, middle of the day, and afternoon, and noonday. And your parents don't like it right? So you should go to sleep... right mom or dad? And mom or dad doesn't like it because it sometimes wakes him or her up and she or him doesn't like that and she or him doesn't want to be cranky right mom or dad? And also our parents don't allow it so they don't let you do it.

And if I am not tired I should lay down and rest, or try to go to sleep right mom or dad. But I should never get up never... right? And if I...Ever... Ever... Ever do that again I will be very very very very very very sorry and try not to do it again never... or never again in my life! And make sure to discipline me so I will learn even though you don't like it when you have to discipline me. I want to learn very very very badly. So I want you to discipline me good. And I don't want to get off of my bed but I can't sleep. And getting off my bed is a very bad choice right?

Oh I forgot a couple of stuff. So on getting out of my bed. So it's because God doesn't like it either... right mom or dad? And about the if I don't get enough sleep. So your parents get cranky too because then you get mad and you get even more cranky right mom? So about the why mom doesn't like it thing. So she doesn't also like it because it is the rule to stay in bed. Oh did i write that down already? Oh well if I did because almost done and I am very happy about that... And I mean it like a ton of times. And if I get out of my bed again I will be very sorry."

Heaven Couldn't Be Better Than That

2011-11-10T16:00:00.000-08:00

A couple weeks ago G and I took a little break from real life and spent a couple days in the Columbia River Gorge. It was fantastic in every way. We dropped the kids off early at my brother's house. Once we were free, our first stop was a 4-hour scenic train ride around the Hood River valley. The fall colors were at their peak and it was so much fun to sit in silence and look out the window at all the farms and trees. We both fell asleep a few times, which at first we felt bad about, but actually that enhanced the experience. Relaxing in every way!

Halfway through the train ride we stopped in a gorgeous rural farming town. The town is known for it's apple and pear orchards and sits at the foot of Mt. Hood. We bought lunch at the little grocery store and sat in the park and ate. The sun was out, the air was warm, and the scenery could not have been more beautiful with the fall colors, and Mt. Hood in the background.

G in front of his beloved Mt. Hood.

Eating our picnic lunch. We both agreed this picnic was a highlight of the weekend. Reminded us of the pre-children era.

Me in a pear orchard.

After our train ride, we drove to a big farm and walked around. It was weird not having the kids because they would have loved it, but I'm not going to lie... it was really nice. We wandered around, picked out some cool gourds for my dining room table, ate a donut, and enjoyed the sunshine.

Next we returned to the city of Hood River and walked up and down the streets looking in all the shops. G found Buddy his very first pair of skis (used) for his birthday! We had dinner at a delicious pizza place and watched an a capella group perform. We felt like we were back at BYU.

Our last stop of the night was our resting place, Skamania Lodge. If you live around here, you must go. Wow! It was so relaxing. They had a giant fire going in the main area of the hotel and a bonfire outside. We sat in the outdoor hot tub. We wandered around the hotel and noticed there wasn't a child in sight. HOW AWESOME IS THAT?!

The next morning we slept in, laid around, watched TV, and finally went to brunch at noon. The main reason we even went to the Skamania Lodge is for the brunch. And that's the main reason you should go too. It was amazingly wonderful. Delicious! After brunch, we sat in the family room and looked out the windows at the rain and decided to take a little nap right there in the rocking chairs. Since we were so exhausted from doing nothing all day, you know.

We drove around a bit, then did some shopping and eventually returned home in the evening. It was the perfect getaway because we were missing the kids by that point. They were mildly happy to see us and after an hour of being back in their presence, we were exhausted again and ready for another weekend away. Luckily it was bed time!

The kids survived without us, of course, in my brother and sis-in law's capable hands. I think Jordan and Tahsha were a little worse for the wear, though. When they told us about their weekend, they kept giving us the "They were great!" line, while giving us that "courtesy" laugh people do when they are feeling really awkward. My parents joined my brother and everybody to take the kids to our ward's trunk-or-treat. My dad said the kids had fun but after comparing my kids' energy level/behavior with the rest of the ward (and my ward has NO shortage of kids), he said, "Your kids had fun. And your kids are not calm."

And this, everyone, is why me and G had so much fun on our weekend away.

That, and the fact that G is a wonderful friend and companion. And as fun as it was to see some new things and eat great food and be without the kids, the very best part was just being with him.

Pray for Snow (by G)

2011-11-05T09:58:00.000-07:00

I have blogged before about the many realizations that I have had that I'm truly a father. Yesterday I had another one of those moments. The awesome thing about the stage in life that we are at with the kids is that my kids are old enough to start participating and enjoying that things in life that I do. I'm happy to report that the boys in the family now have season passes to Mt. Hood Meadows. It was a proud day.

Destruction

2011-10-27T17:09:00.000-07:00

It has been a gorgeous fall here in Oregon. We have had spectacular sunrises three days in a row.* The beauty of the blue skies this week and the vibrant fall colors and the crunchy leaves on the sidewalk have literally taken my breath away a few times. This is why I'm a proud Oregonian! I don't remember fall ever being so gorgeous before, though. Normally I'm not a huge fan of this time of year, although I love the colors of the leaves. I usually am too torn up about the cooler weather and school starting to appreciate the beauty of the trees. But I'm changing that because obviously I've been missing out.

My boys have been playing outside a lot this week. I am sitting here on the couch paying bills and watching them launch large outside toys off the slide in our backyard. I've been thinking a lot lately about letting kids be kids, and in my case: letting boys be boys. I can guarantee people will get hurt and toys will get broken during this adventure. Should I stop them? I already yelled at them 15 minutes ago for breaking most of our Halloween decorations in the front yard in their quest to re-decorate for the 100th time. I hate ruined things and messes. You have no idea how much I hate messes! Anyone who knows me knows I like order. But somehow I got creative kids and they can't be themselves if they are clean, tidy, and don't touch things.

And don't get me started on their incessant climbing. We went to the pumpkin patch this week and I had to tell Buddy (almost 8 years old) 4 times in a matter of a few minutes to GET DOWN off of different things that weren't "safe" by my standards to be climbing on. But then I'm not sure about my standards since I'm scared of heights. The last straw was him climbing on the TOP of the play structure's monkey bars. I told him to get down and threatened to leave since he wasn't listening. But then I stopped myself. It was a play structure, after all. I pretended like I was reading my magazine to avoid all the horrified looks I got from all the parents the rest of the time we were there.

What's a mother like me to do? Seriously! Give me some advice here, please! Should I allow them to break things and climb to unsafe heights, or should I continue to harp on them so they turn out like me?! Or is there another solution I can't see here?

* The sun rises late this week. Don't worry I'm still not an early riser! Come to think of it, I think this week is the first time I've ever seen a sunrise... In my life. No wonder I'm so impressed!

My Day

2011-10-12T22:19:00.000-07:00

This picture has nothing to do with this post, but I love it. This is at Buddy's "Fun Run" a few weeks ago. Click on the picture to enlarge it so you can see both my boys. Buddy ran 8 laps in 20 minutes and Sambo ran 9 laps in about 90 minutes. It was in the 90's that day so they had an area just up the track from where they are where they could take drinks and get hosed off.

Compared to Monday, today was a colossal FAIL. Nothing bad happened, but all sorts of things and people bugged me. But after evaluating what my basic problem was today, I realized something: I forgot to pray this morning. Things have been hectic around here with lots going on, and lots of friends in real crisis. I've been trying to be all things to all people and mostly it's been working out OK. Praying has been a requirement for making it through the day in one piece, though. Take Monday for example. It might have been one of the busiest days I've ever had (besides finals weeks at BYU of course). I had a list of things to do so long my head started spinning four days in advance. I got organized days in advance and starting checking things off my list. By Sunday night I was overwhelmed by what still HAD to be done. I prayed on Monday morning that the hours would move slowly and I'd get everything done. I did get every single thing done besides going to the gym. And I still had time to provide my daily service, read to Sambo, make homemade soup (which is a story in and of itself*), homemade rolls, and watch a little TV before bed. It was one of those "loaves and fishes" (except in this case it was loaves and minutes) types of experiences.

Today was the opposite. I had a lot to do, but wanted to make time to spend a little time with the kids. I budgeted my time so I could take them to the library and to the park. Maybe it was because I only got five hours of sleep last night, but I'm pretty sure the day was long and hard and the kids were annoying, and I had no patience, and I only got three things (of 30) done on my "to-do" list -- all because I forgot to pray. What a difference it makes!

Squash Soup Mutiny

Here are a few of the things I did laugh or smile about today. I have made three kinds of soup this week. I'm not a fan (gasp!) of Fall, but soup makes it bearable. Plus I had two different kinds of soup last night at enrichment. So that makes FIVE soups in FOUR days. That must be some sort of record. *Do you want to hear more about the Monday night soup incident? My kids are remarkable eaters. I know Buddy was born that way (not Sambo, however). I have zero tolerance for picky-ness and have never ever in my entire eight years of mothering served my children something special because they didn't like what I had made. I'm a pretty decent dinner-maker and provide a huge variety of healthy meals. My kids always eat, even if they complain a little. I do not battle over food. I always give them the choice of eating without drama and complaining, or sitting on their bed while the rest of us eat. Neither has ever chosen to sit on their bed. Well, Monday night I made butternut squash soup. It's a recipe from my sister, that I really love and it's very similar to a zucchini soup recipe I made two weeks ago that we all really love. Well, apparently these kids HATE squash. I cannot even tell you the mutiny I had. I already knew G hated the soup, but wow. The kids were actually crying about it. Not throwing a tantrum or complaining, but downright sobbing. I gave them a few bites each and they both were gagging and heaving like I've never seen. So, for the first time ever, I gave them some yogurt and some rolls and called it dinner. I found it so incredibly funny, I am still laughing about it two days later. And the best news, I got all the leftovers!

Here are two awesome dinner conversations from tonight:

Buddy: These rolls are good.
Sambo: Told you!
Buddy: You never told me that, you're just trying to make conversation.

And...

Buddy: MOM!!!!!! Sambo just told me he wants to kill me with a knife!
Sambo: No! Not a real knife!

And here's a story G told me about our neighbors. Our neighbors are amazing. Some of the best people we've ever met. Unfortunately, their house is on the market and I think that if their house sells I'll have to go on anti-depressants. I love them and I want my kids to be close friends with their kids. And I want their oldest daughter to be our permanent babysitter. She turns 12 next week! (And if I'm being honest, I want Buddy to marry their youngest daughter.) Anyway, one son, Tyler is in Buddy's class. Their homework was to write sentences using their spelling words. One of the spelling words was "when." Tyler wrote this: "Don't you hate it when your butt crack itches?"

No can't you see why I'm devastated they are moving? HILARIOUS kids!

Sambo decided today he wants a princess dress to dress-up in. He asked me several times. Finally, I had the idea to dress him up in the sundress I wear after swimming. He thought he looked so pretty and then asked me to put a "silly band" (but what he meant was a rubberband

Pretty Princess

I was starving after the gym and was craving Burgerville today. I resisted and started driving home, the opposite direction from Burgerville. The craving intensified and I couldn't handle it, so I had to wheel into the drive-thru of Burger King before I got home. It totally hit the spot!

Sambo feels bad for his brother that he gets to make crafts at preschool and gets prizes at speech. So he started making Buddy special little crafts and surprising him when he gets home from school. He thinks of them all on his own. As you can imagine, Buddy loves it. Last week Sambo cut up a bunch of papers and glued them all together to make a robot. Yesterday while I was in the shower he found some straws, cut them all up and glued them on a paper like "thorns." As a person with NO creativity or artistic inclinations, I am always so impressed! And I was particularly relieved it was only straws he cut up and not something important!

"Thorns"

Today while at the park my kids were being really annoying. Getting in the mud, hiding in the bushes by the road where middle school kids walk by, begging me to push them the entire time on the tire swing which is fine except Sambo wants to go slow and Buddy wants to go FAST. Anyway, I was about to pull the plug on the outing and called to Buddy that we were leaving. He said he wanted to do the monkey bars one more time. As I called to him a few minutes later because he still hadn't come, I noticed him helping a slightly younger girl ease her way off the monkey bars. She was stuck and a little afraid. He was holding one of her feet, guiding and encouraging her. As irritating as he can be, he impresses me so much. He is good to the core.

Now that I type all this out, I guess it wasn't that bad of a day after all. (Especially now that the kids are asleep and G is finally home to do the dishes!) The therapy of typing makes up for the fact that I should have been doing something more productive, I guess.

The Normal Grind

2011-10-06T21:23:00.000-07:00

Unfortunately, nothing exciting or 'blogworthy' has been happening around here. Sometimes no news is good news, though, so I'm not complaining.

A few mildly interesting things:

Dear, dear, dear friends are getting placed with a baby through adoption this weekend, God willing. They have waited a very long time for this. Prayers go out to the birthmom that she will have strength and peace.
Another long-time friend just got placed with a toddler last weekend. They adopted her through the state in a very long and heart-wrenching process. It was a true miracle it worked out. I am so happy for them! They waited for her for so many years I lost track. Their oldest daughter is 10, so it's been a loooong time.
And speaking of adoption, I got sucked into watching and reading all the tributes to Steve Jobs today. A friend on facebook said something like "all geniuses were adopted." Amen to that! Have you seen the commencement address he gave at Stanford? Watch it! A fascinating, brilliant, and wise man.
We went to Coldstone tonight to celebrate our September "service challenge." Each of us tried to do service every day and whoever did service the most days got the biggest ice cream. Buddy won. He took this challenge very seriously and did service almost every day. He picked cotton candy ice cream (bright blue) with kit-kat. I had to laugh at that combo!
We also took the kids to get the flu mist vaccine tonight. This is the first time they've had it. In the past they've always had the flu shot because they've both had "asthma" within the year. They both have grown out of any asthma symptoms, which is really great. No coughing/wheezing, no expensive meds, and no more flu shots! Although Sambo is weird and actually told the nurse he wanted the shot instead of the mist. (???) She talked him out of it.
Speaking of flu shots, I got one a couple weeks ago and two days later came down with the nastiest virus I've had in awhile. I'm still not feeling back to normal. I carefully read the flu vaccine paperwork tonight (since I didn't read it when I got it. does anyone?) and the paperwork says you can't get the flu from the flu shot. However, the paperwork did say you could have all the flu "symptoms" from the shot. I guess it's good news that I didn't in fact have the flu like I thought and wouldn't have died from my virus, considering I honestly thought I was on death's doorstep.
And since I can't stop talking about the flu, I must make note that I have the world's best husband. When I was on death's doorstep he stayed home from work to take the boys where they needed to go. Actually, he also took Sambo into the office for a little while, which is something he swore he'd never do again (after he did it the last time). He took the boys out one evening so I could moan in a silent house. I never asked him to do it or expected it, but he's fabulous like that.
While at the doctor tonight we weighed the boys and they both have gained 4 pounds since we had them weighed there, two months ago. That's a lot! Especially since the previous 8 months Sambo had only gained one pound. I'm not really surprised, especially with Buddy because he eats like a horse. He now officially eats more than I do, which is saying something considering I've never been a lightweight myself. The good news is, the boys are getting awesomely close to being big enough to be done with carseats/move to a booster seat. Yay! And that means if we ever get another baby we don't have to buy a mini van because everyone will fit in my Subaru. Although we might still want one because we could never transport friends. But that's a conversation for another day...
G threw a pair of underwear away tonight that he bought in 1994. I cannot stop laughing about that. I'm sorry if you don't think that's blogworthy because I do.
My favorite blogger stopped blogging last week and then changed her mind and started it up again today. Fabulous news!
I am putting together a list of favorite books for a Relief Society class I'm teaching next week. Please leave a comment with your favorites!

More Insights From Buddy and Sambo

2011-09-17T22:25:00.000-07:00

The best dinner Sambo's every had. It just so happened to be the only time his father has cooked... in awhile. But it made an impact.

My kids have a strange interest in "juvi." You know, juvenile detention. I'm not sure how Buddy first learned about it, but he threatens Sambo from time to time that if he doesn't follow the laws of the land, he will have to go to juvi. It's sinking in because yesterday Sambo was playing with his cars and I heard him talking about sending some to juvi for not driving nice.

Additionally, tonight Buddy was trying to convince me that it's all my fault he gets in trouble so much because it's "my choice" to discipline him or not. I used his interest in juvi to argue my point: that I have a responsibility to teach him to obey. I have to follow through with consequences otherwise he'll never learn that rules must be obeyed. A child can either be disciplined by their parents when they are young, or disciplined by the "system" when they are teenagers, and as a result sent to juvi. I'm not sure if that's good parenting or not, but it made my point and he totally understood.

Are my kids the only kids interested in juvi?

* * *

I was going through some old papers and realized I had a form from Sambo's speech class that he was supposed to fill out with my help and give to G for Father's Day. We worked on it and surprised daddy when he came home today. I seriously had to stifle my laughter while I filled it out. We all laughed until we cried when we read it together with daddy. Out of the mouth of babes.

To: Dad
From: Sambo, age 3 1/2

My dad is as handsome as a: dog.
My dad smells like: poop.
My dad likes to: make dinner.
My dad makes the best: dinner ever me have.
When I am sick my dad: helps take me to doctor.
When I am sad my dad: helps me not cry.
I like my dad's: toes and feet.
I love my dad because: he is good.

Growing Up

2011-09-13T16:52:00.000-07:00

I am madly in love with this child. He is such a huge blessing in my life especially with my high-strung personality. He is the perfect compliment to me. I just love him so much. Since Buddy has been back to school, I've noticed how much Sambo has matured over the summer. It's hard to tell when Buddy is around all the time because he's the one that does all the talking and pretty much runs the show. I hate to phrase it like this, but Sambo lives very much in Buddy's shadow. Not that Sambo minds. Buddy has a HUGE personality and requires a lot more parenting than Sambo. Sambo has the perfect personality to fit in wherever he is needed in this family. He goes with the flow and as long as we treat him like a big boy, he is easy. He is Buddy's right-hand man. He is G's best friend. And he is my comfort. If only I could find joy in the simple things like he does.

Sambo headed off for his first day of preschool today. It's nothing fancy, just a fun co-op with a few friends. Each mom takes turns teaching and the kids get to be together, play games and do all sorts of crafts. To say he was ecstatic to be going to school "same as Yoah" (aka his brother), would be the understatement of the year. He has literally never eaten breakfast so fast. He was ready and milling around the house with his backpack on before I was ready. Well, actually it was his brother's backpack from Kindergarten/1st grade because like I mentioned earlier, he wanted to be "same as Yoah." So while I was upstairs getting ready, he packed his backpack all by himself with his water bottle and his graham cracker snack I had sitting out on the counter. (I've been trying to teach Buddy to do that for two years!) After I picked him up from preschool he informed me he loved having his Cheez-its for a snack "same as Yoah." I said, "Cheez-its? You took graham crackers." And then he explained that he did indeed take the graham crackers that I packed, but he also packed himself a separate bag of Cheez-its. For the record, his brother has NEVER thought to get himself a snack. And even more interesting, he left no mess. There were no crumbs, and the box was put back in the cupboard where it belongs.

Not only has Sambo matured emotionally, but he is talking a lot more. And his reasoning skills have improved the most of all. He still talks like a baby, so to hear him argue or reason things out like an almost 4-year old is surprising and if I'm being honest, totally adorable. I'm sure this change has been gradual, but I really am noticing it now that I'm alone with him more. I'm sure he learned a lot as Buddy's apprentice all summer too, since Buddy can pretty much talk anyone in or out of anything.

Here are a few anecdotes to illustrate my point just from this morning:

We went to Safeway and Sambo spent the last half of our shopping trip trying to convince me that he needed to bring his pillow next time so he can get more comfortable in the cart. The metal cart hurts his head and back when he tries to lay down.

He spent the two hours after preschool recounting the whole experience. I could not believe the details he shared. He shared nothing about what they learned, but what everyone ate for snack, and who got in trouble for what reasons. (Just like his brother always does when he comes home...)

I heard a ruckus going on in his room and it sounded like he was getting into his dresser. A few minutes later he came downstairs with new shorts on, and upon examination, new underwear too. I asked him what was going on and he told me he peed his pants. This is a very rare occurrence, but it does happen when he wants attention. So I gave him a very stern "no" and put him timeout where he'd be getting NO attention. Then I went upstairs to find his wet underwear. Low and behold, his underwear and shorts were totally dry. So I pulled him out of timeout to find out what was going on. And he confessed that he just wanted to wear his Buzz Lightyear underwear, so he pretended to pee his pants.

He told me that when I'm a kid and he's the parent, he's going to go to his friend Connor's house anytime he wants.

Apparently at preschool a kid wrote on the couch with crayon (the teacher's son, luckily). Well, Sambo got mad at me shortly after coming home and wrote on our couch. I put him in timeout and when he came out I could tell he was really sorry. Time passed, and after lunch I saw him taking a towel and trying to rub the crayon off. I explained that crayon doesn't come off and he ruined the couch and I was really mad that he does stuff like that. He batted his big brown eyes at me and said, "You said when making me yunch you not mad at me anymore." Adorable.

He pronounces toy "foy," so we were working on that today. All of a sudden he covered his eyes and said, "No talk so loud at me!" I must have been yelling in his face. Poor thing! But he was able to finally get the correct pronunciation!

And the best of all: While we were at Safeway, a dad with a baby in a front carrier walked by and Sambo made reference to them. I always try to convince him he's my baby, so I asked him, "Where's my baby?" He said, "You not have one. Heavenly Father say babies too expensive." I literally laughed out loud there in the checkout line. I asked him who taught him that, but he said nobody. At first. I asked him if daddy taught him that, and he meekly said, "Yes."

Daddy is busted.

The Summit

2011-09-08T22:06:00.000-07:00

The beginning of our hike.

This summer G had a meeting in Bend, so we all tagged along for the weekend. Saturday after G's meeting we decided to visit Smith Rock, famous for it's gorgeous scenery and amazing rock climbing. We planned to take a short little hike to look for mountain climbers. We thought the boys would enjoy watching them. It was hot -- around 90 degrees -- and there was signage at the entrance reminding hikers to pack water. We weren't planning on really "hiking," but at the last minute I returned to the car to get a couple more water bottles so we'd each have one. Boy am I glad I did! As it was, we still had to seriously ration our water and could have used quite a bit more.

Taking a water break

After we got started with our hike, we were enjoying ourselves so much we decided to complete a loop. We knew it was just over 3 miles, but we didn't realize how hot and strenuous it would be. The loop -- with plenty of stops for water and a break to wade in the river -- took us four hours. The middle had steep switchbacks. And the end was steep downhill with a dangerous cliff to the side, which really scared me. I was really stressed making sure the boys stayed safe considering one of our boys walks on the wild side and the other one is only three years old.

But we made it safe and sound and we actually had a really great time. It was a really fun bonding experience for our family. There is something about working hard as a family that builds character and creates memories. (I'm sounding suspiciously like my parents here.)

Another break. Notice how red-faced and sweaty the boys are.

I already knew this, but I enjoyed seeing how strong and brave our boys are. Buddy was wearing flip flops because he forgot to pack his socks. He didn't seem to mind. And the kids had very little sleep the night before: going to bed at 10:30 and getting up at 6:30 with the sun in their eyes. They had swam already that morning for two hours at the pool. But as I've assumed for years: nothing exhausts Buddy. In fact, not only did he not complain, but he actually begged us to go faster and any chance he got, he scurried up and down the rocks on the side of the trail like a little jackrabbit. He took at least twice as many steps as the rest of us. At one point Buddy was scrambling around (looking for rattlesnakes) and started to slide off the trail. He slid a few feet and luckily his fall was arrested by a sagebrush. It was actually pretty scary, especially since I had seen a similar story on the news earlier that week of a boy not quite so fortunate.

The summit! The famous "monkey face" rock in the to the left.

Buddy spent the entire time looking for wildlife. At one point he caught a lizard which latched onto his finger and bit him. We weren't sure if it was dangerous or not, and it wasn't letting go on it's own, so we shouted for Buddy pull it off and drop it. He was mad at us the rest of the time for making him lose his "pet" lizard.

Sambo did fabulous as well. He didn't complain either. The closest he came to whining was informing us "This is a really bad idea!" or that he didn't "want to come here ever again!" anytime the walk would get especially steep. But he is a trooper and made it the entire way without being carried.

One thing about this hike was how beautiful the rocks and scenery were all along the way. It made the hike especially rewarding that around each switchback was another gorgeous view.

On the car ride home Buddy took a poll, asking by the show of hands, who was proud of themselves. We all raised our hands.

Read This

2011-09-06T14:06:00.000-07:00

I wish I was the kind of person that could write like this. Please make reading this article a priority. I'm really glad I ran across this today, especially since these are ideas that have been spinning around in my head for a couple of weeks now. Profound.

Achieving Summer Goals

2011-09-01T22:39:00.000-07:00

If you don't like bragging posts, don't read on. We have very little to brag about -- and quite frankly, very little good news lately, so I'm going for the gusto with this post.

My family is the coolest. Seriously. We met our reading goal of reading 10,000 pages this summer. The official page count was: 10,283 pages between the three of us from June through August. I hope you are as proud as we are!

G is a speed reader and Buddy is an exceptional reader. I've never been much of a reader, although I've always liked it alright. Plus I have some weird thing where my eyes don't track properly so I read really slowly, which is annoying and in the past has been a turnoff to me reading anything long. However, my sister and mom are always telling me about great books and Buddy is so enthusiastic... I decided I needed to rise to the good reading I was always encouraging Buddy to do. In the last couple of years I've been reading as much as possible, but this summer we ramped it up to a whole new level. It was so exciting to talk about our respective books with each other as a family and to choose reading over TV, housework, or even sleep. I hope we've all officially established a life-long habit of reading good books.

Our reward is going to a fun pizza place as a family to eat and play games. That will be scheduled soon. Plus we'll also take the kids to pick out a new book, which is a huge thrill for Buddy.

Unfortunately, I'm the only one that kept track of the books I read. Next year we'll be better about that. Still, we covered a lot of ground between the three of us and can make all sorts of book recommendations now! Here are the dets:

G won (surprise, surprise):
3943 pages read
Completed 10 books with 2 more in progress.

Buddy came in second:
3328 pages read
Completed 17 books with 2 more in progress.

I came in third:
3012 pages read
Completed 9 books with 3 more in progress.

And in case anyone cares, G also won our $20 prize for all three months for our other summer challenge. (He bought Rockband 3, Rockband songs, and a laminator with his prize money.) Him winning really makes me mad, so I'm never doing that contest with him again. Although, I have to say focusing our time and energies this summer on exercise, service, scriptures, learning, reading, and work was a brilliant idea if I do say so myself. It gave purpose to each day and and helped us focus on things that really matter to us as a family. We hope to keep up the good habits we established as we start a new school year, particularly our habit of doing service every day for someone outside our family.

Today the boys and I went to Oaks Park, an amusement park in Portland, to reward Buddy for good behavior, as part of a new discipline program we started. We had such a good time. Both kids are brave and LOVE the exhileration of adrenaline, so they both loved it. The weather was perfect and the kids were having fun, so we stayed all day. Buddy was a little too small to ride all the biggest rides and Sambo was a little too small to ride the big kid rides, but they still had fun. Buddy was still able to ride some of the "intermediate" rides, like the Octopus, that old school ride with the cages, and his favorite, The Eruption. The boys both loved the rollercoaster best. Buddy is counting down the days now until he can he is tall enough to ride everything!

We got our pass to the amusement park for doing the summer reading program through the library. The ride bracelet allowed the boys to rollerskate as well. We only had 20 minutes to rollerskate before it closed, but they both had a lot of fun. True to each boys personalities, Sambo cried and was unwilling to try after he fell down a few minutes into starting. But once he regained his motivation, he did amazing, considering he was the smallest child I saw there. And Buddy struggled to stay up, but never once stopped trying. By the end of the 20 minutes he was dripping with sweat and was so sad the time was up. It was absolutely hilarious watching them. I couldn't stop laughing!

We Should Be in a Marching Band

2011-08-21T22:19:00.000-07:00

This has become the summer of parades. As it turns out, we've been in three and watched one this summer -- all for different causes.

My dad suggested we register to walk the parade route for the Grand Floral Parade during the Rose Festival. If we paid the entry fee (which benefited a center for grieving children), then walked the 4-mile parade route just ahead of the actual parade, we got reserved seats to watch the parade when we finished. It was a great suggestion and we had a lot of fun doing it with my parents and my brother and his family. I hope we do it again!

Darling cousins before our walk started.

Getting ready to walk the parade route.

Here we are walking the parade route. People line the streets early to stake out good spots for the parade so we had "spectators" the whole way.

Watching the Grand Floral Parade after our walk.

Then in July Sambo's birthmother's mom invited us to walk with her in our town's parade. She is the Oregon Mother of the Year, so she has been spending the year speaking to groups and making appearances to spread the word about the honor and dignity of motherhood. G and Buddy sat in the crowd and waved as we walked by. I walked with Sambo's birthmom and he got to ride in the car and wave at the crowd. As you can imagine, I got lots of questions about our association with the Mother of the Year, but as you now, I'm always happy to talk adoption!

Here Sambo is with his birth grandma, Oregon's 2011 mother of the year!

Buddy and James after the parade holding their haul. Buddy opted to "watch" the parade rather than participate so he could collect candy. Smart kid!

This past week we joined a parade to kick off the county fair. We walked with a few members of our adoption support group. It's a fun tradition we started a few years ago and I hope we keep it up. The parade route is short and it's fun to wear our adoption shirts and throw candy. And then for participating, we get into the fair for free. My mom joined us and we spent the entire day at the fair. The weather was perfect, so we took our time wandering around, hanging out listening to music, looking at the animals, eating popcorn and snowcones, and getting free stickers and flyers from the various booths. The ladies at the "right to life" booth got a HUGE kick out of our adoption shirts, to say the least. I think we made those women's day/life.

Me and the boys before the parade. Notice the boys' sweet new adoption shirts. Too bad you can't see mine.

Here is our little group, minus my mom and the girl taking the picture.

We also watched the 4th of July parade in my parents town. I LOVE this parade, since I grew up going every year. And we've gone every year that we've lived her since finishing at BYU (bless G's heart for being a good sport.) However, after having watched the Grand Floral Parade a few weeks prior, my kids weren't as thrilled as me by the one-float-parade. When the motorcycle cop finished the parade, Buddy shouted, "Yay! The parade is about to start!" We felt bad telling him, sorry, that was actually the end.

Here we are enjoying the parade. My parents ward was the only "float" in the whole parade.

G wanted me to point out that they always play "Louis, Louis" at parades. Anyone know why that is? Since we are now parade experts, we should know!

Catch Up

2011-08-19T22:00:00.000-07:00

I'm bound and determined to get caught up on the ol' blog about the fun we've had this summer. We have had a great summer although we've definitely had some low points. Although it's winding down, I'm in denial and refuse to talk about school in a few weeks. We're still going strong and trying to enjoy every day. We haven't done anything extravagant and haven't done any big vacations. But you know how you can tell we've been having fun? My house is a mess, I haven't been to the gym as much as I'd like, and the blog is neglected. Something's got to give, right?

However, my yard and garden are in good shape, we've been to the zoo three times, we go to the pool once a week, we've been to the park too many times to count, Sam learned to ride a bike, we've picked berries lots of times, we read constantly, we've played with lots of friends, we go to the library once a week, we've been to Bend, we've been to parades, our friend Ben put a beehive in our backyard, we got a visit from G's sister and family, I went to an adoption conference and the boys held down the fort at home, we've been sad with friends who have been having a hard time, we've reviewed our parenting and learned yesterday our kids are poorly behaved and it's all our fault (long story and I'm only slightly being facetious), we've been to the beach with another trip planned tomorrow, today we went boating, and next week I'm going to start canning. Phew!

A few of our events deserve a separate post, but here are a few recent pictures.

At the zoo with Sambo's birthmom. She is SO good to both boys. I love her for that (among lots of other obvious reasons).

Ben put a beehive in our backyard. He's showing us one of the frames. We have all been fascinated by our new little pets. I think he said there are 50,000 bees in the hive.

4th of July. Yes, Buddy's head is sweaty from riding his bike for hours.

Eating ice cream at the Tillamook Cheese Factory. One of our favorite places.

This child loves to climb. (Loves is an understatement.)

I love this boy. My love was tested (so to speak) yesterday and I shocked myself with how defensive I became of him. Love, love, love him.

Jumping off the sand dunes at the beach.

Have I mentioned this child is part monkey? My littler son is there in the pic too, but not quite as adventurous. Buddy at the top, Sambo at the bottom, and some other kid in the middle.

Riding the zoo train. Poor Sambo gets strangled by his brother every time they pose for a picture together.

At the children's museum with our best friends.

This is Sambo's best friend in the whole world. They are playing "vet" at the children's museum. I almost died of cute overload.

Eating a treat in Bend.

Who Am I Now?

2011-08-02T20:51:00.000-07:00

Do you remember my Trump or Monkey post concerning Sambo's hair? Well, we finally found a hairstyle that is super cute and he's been sporting that for a few months now. It started to get really long in the bangs, although it had grown out to a good length everywhere else. G took him to get his bangs trimmed today and he came home looking suspiciously like Jim Carrey. This poor kid can't win!

And for comparison's sake, here's what he looked like before the bangs got trimmed: Oh well, he's still the most adorable brown-eyed boy I've ever seen.

Beans Beans the Magical Fruit

2011-07-28T21:49:00.000-07:00

I haven't blogged lately because nothing really funny has been going on. Alas, we had a memorable comment from Buddy tonight at dinner. I made white bean and chicken chili for dinner. (I know, not very summer-y, but it sounded good -- and it was.) After placing Buddy's bowl in front of him he said, "Oh good! Looks like we'll all have the farts tonight!" Then he proceeded to tell me that white beans are the second most "farty" bean, right behind (my pun, not his) red beans. Apparently he read this in a book. And in case you were curious, we had broccoli as a side dish.

Did you miss me and my fascinating blog posts?

Blessed

2011-07-05T01:49:00.000-07:00

We are so blessed.

We hope you had a great 4th of July like we did.

Many of our friends and family members are having a rough year and their day wasn't quite as joyous.

We thought of you today.

And are counting our many blessings tonight.

Summer Schedule

2011-07-04T00:09:00.000-07:00

During this past school year I learned a few things about myself. Apparently I do not like having a rigid schedule: Be to bed by 8:00 or else, wake up at the crack of dawn, get homework turned in on Thursdays, books due back to the library Wednesday this week, Friday next week, track Tuesday and Thursdays, be home every day for the bus by 2:30, etc -- you get the idea. I'm a very rigid person anyway, so apparently having a rigid schedule puts me over the edge. And to think this is only with ONE school-aged kid. I honestly have no idea how people with lots of kids do the school/activity rat race. It drives me insane. It puts me in a foul mood.

However, I'm a very organized and involved parent, so I love having a plan for my kids. Just a flexible plan, apparently.

So I made a flexible plan for our summer. I made a list of fun things we should do, and I'm happy to report we've accomplished a fair amount already.

We made a goal as a family (well, those of us that can read) to read a combined 10,000 pages from chapter books during the months of June, July, and August. With one month down, I'm very pleased to report we are right on track to accomplishing that goal. (Luckily we have G on our team, who is a bona fide speed reader. Thank you BYU Law School for requiring him to read hundreds of pages a night. That degree has come in handy over and over again!)

And last, we are having another contest each month. Every day we try to complete six different tasks: Exercise, Service, Read Scriptures (Buddy's goal is to work on Articles of Faith AND scriptures both), Learn something, Read, and Work. We each have our own chart and put a sticker on the chart for each time we complete the task. If we are highly motivated and get our rear in gear, we could potentially get six stickers each day. Whoever gets the most stickers each month wins. The prize is $20 and G won for the month of June with 108 stickers. Buddy came in second, me third, and Sambo fourth. I've decided G has an un-fair advantage since I have the responsibility of doing my tasks PLUS helping the boys complete theirs. But whatever, life isn't fair I guess. There is no penalty for not doing the tasks and I don't beg the kids to do them.

If I do say so myself, this has been one of the smartest things I've ever come up with. I don't have to hassle my kids (or myself) to get things done, AND we've been accomplishing a ton all at our own pace and according to whatever schedule we want. All with a healthy dose of competition/money, which is a great motivator for my kids.

Are you getting tired of my "I love summer vacation" posts yet? Too bad because I have a few more in the works. Including a pros and cons list of homeschool. Feel free to start drafting your opinions because I want to hear them.

Another Perfect Week/Day

2011-07-01T22:20:00.000-07:00

I was extremely excited for summer vacation to begin. And it's actually turning out better than I thought it would, which is saying a lot -- considering I was imaging perfection.

This week:
Zoo with Sam's birthmom
Visit from my mom
Weed 3/4 of our backyard
Stare at amazingly awesome veggie garden
Library trip
Temple trip and food with G
Bake cookies with friends and deliver to fireman and police in our community. Christy's brilliant idea.
Eat lunch and talk to friends at the gym
Put kids to bed ridiculously late every night

Today:
Kids sleep in til 9:00
Learn Myndi is going camping this weekend
Strawberry picking. Plants full of berries. Best picking I've ever done.
Gym
BBQ at park to celebrate Nicki's birth
80-degree weather
Kids jump and roll in mud at park and experience pure joy
Lady gets snippy with me concerning someone else's kid. In so many words, tell her to CHILL OUT.
Eat amazing salted caramel cupcake
Come home to different friend's amazing peanut butter cup cupcakes
Buddy washes himself and his brother in the bath without being asked to help me out
Kids' friends sleep over
Kids fall asleep easily (thankyouverymuch Melatonin)
Look at totally cool beehive Ben put in our backyard

And this, my friends, is why I love summer vacation.

Father's Day (by G)

2011-06-21T22:03:00.000-07:00

Me and the boys flying a kite at dusk on the beach.

I always wondered why on Mother's Day, the mother gets a break from the kids, however, on Father's Day, the father "gets" to spend time with the kids. In my case, I did actually want to spend time with my boys.

I had to work on Saturday and when I got home, M had prepared a menu of items that I got to choose from for breakfast and lunch the following day. Dinner, she informed me, was going to be with all of her extended family. She also started Father's Day that night and got the kids already for bed before we took them over to a friends' house to hang out.

On Sunday, I got to sleep in (which M usually let's me do on Sundays anyways) and then was greeted by a bright-eyed 3-year old asking me if I wanted peppers in my breakfast burrito. I rolled myself out of bed when he told me it was time to get up and come downstairs. M had made my requested breakfast burritos with sausage, egg, cheese and peppers. I got orange juice to drink and a doughnut. It was fabulous.

After breakfast, me and the boys sat down and watched the Fantastic Mr. Fox. We all enjoyed it. When lunchtime rolled around, I was still pretty full from a late breakfast, so M made me a wonderful fruit salad. Then it was off to Church. The fathers got a bag of M&Ms. After Church we came home for a minute and then went over to M's aunt and uncle's house for burgers and dogs. We came home a few hours later, M got the kids bathed and put in bed. I spent the rest of the evening on the couch reading.

The day was low key and very nice. I feel so incredibly blessed to have such a wonderful and loving wife, and two amazing kids. I love spending time with all of them and was glad that I could focus on enjoying them. I would not be what I am today if it weren't for them. Thanks for the great day.

School is Out

2011-06-16T07:58:00.000-07:00

In three hours.

We survived. (barely)

Halle-freakin-lujah!

Let the sleeping in and fun begin.

I can not express how much I hate school as a parent.

It's weird, cause I actually liked it when I was a kid.

But I've always loved summer and sleep.

Easy 80s

2011-06-09T13:35:00.000-07:00

The other night I was getting ready for bed really late. G was downstairs finishing a movie. It was so late that the late-night talk shows were over. Instead of watching my Tivo'd 11:00 news, I got sucked into an infomercial for a collection of CD's of 80's music. Maybe I should be ashamed, but I knew and liked most of the "150 most romantic and sensual love songs of the 80's." Blame my parents, I guess. But I was raised on that music! I can't help but love it.

For the record, I have never in my life watched an infomercial. And I am well acquainted with all the hottest music, so I'm not totally stuck in the stone age. But with each consecutive song, I got more excited. I hit "record" so I could re-watch the show later. I called G upstairs to watch with me. I ran calculations to determine if the $150 pricetag was worth it. (It's not.) And since then I've been making a list of songs we need added to our itunes, and I've been hunting down our old music we already have.

Chicago, Kenny Rogers, Journey, Neil Diamond, Air Supply, Lionel Richie. The Killers are cool and all, but they are no Lionel Richie.

Happy Things

2011-06-08T21:46:00.000-07:00

My boys on the beach at sunset last week.

A couple things have made me extremely happy the past few days.

I have never made dinner rolls before and my first attempt was perfection. I hope it wasn't beginner's luck! Then G made honey butter which I thought was a bad idea at first. But then I changed my mind and perfect rolls became ridiculous. In an amazing way.

We dusted off my Aerosmith greatest hits CD (Big Ones) and gave it whirl tonight. I hadn't listened to it in probably ten years, yet it's one of my favorites. Angel is probably my all-time favorite song. Looooooooove it. Now that I've been reminded of that fact, I will be listening to it all the time.

My bathroom smells like gardenias because my gardenia plant is finally in bloom. I've had the plant for years and it finally is blooming for the first time.

I sealed 29 mylar bags of food for long-term food storage yesterday with a friend. I did whole wheat macaroni, brown rice, quinoa, chocolate chips, steel cut oats, trail mix, brown sugar, and wheat germ. I had so much fun I'm going to do white flour in a couple weeks. I love canning in any form I've decided.

My garden is doing amazing, thanks to our new planter boxes and fancy soil. We are doing square foot gardening this year for the first time, so the yield is yet to be determined. But the seeds are all up and the plants look great!

Only 5.5 days of school left. Which means only 6 more times of getting up early. There are no words to describe the anticipation and joy to be schedule-free for a couple months.

And just so you don't think I'm too Pollyanna-ish, here's some bad news. Buddy lost his second tooth last week and informed us that he doesn't believe in the tooth fairy "because I felt a hand under my pillow and it was more the size of a human hand than a fairy hand. Plus a tooth fairy just makes no sense." So we came clean. It hurt me more than it hurt him, though. He said he still has an imagination so he'll still get excited about "her" coming. And we told him he could help us be the tooth fairy for Sambo one day, which softened the blow a little too, I think.

And I had to get new fingerprints for my criminal background check today because it's time to renew our adoption homestudy. Which means we've been waiting for baby #3 for two years. Please share our adoption blog or our adoption profile with anyone that could help. Sambo gets mad when I pretend like he's a baby, so please save him the trauma of being tortured by being treated like a baby and help us find another baby. Thanks!

Olive You!

2011-05-22T21:27:00.000-07:00

We've had a lot of really funny moments with Buddy lately. Seriously, we have a funny comment or funny incident pretty much every day. Not all make the cut on the ol' blog, unfortunately. I keep thinking I need to make a separate blog called the Chronicles of N...

The following two stories happened on the same day last week.

Buddy came home from school to inform me he got "frostbite" at school. It was a fairly nice day with blue skies and temps in the high 60's so it was obvious that was not the case, but I let him tell his story. Apparently his thumb turned gray during lunch and frostbite was determined the most likely cause. All the kids gathered around to look at it and one girl suggested he visit the school nurse. He went to the nurse, who took a look at it and sent him back to class. When Buddy was telling me the story, he finished by saying, "That nurse obviously knows nothing about frostbite."

I tried to ask a lot of questions to figure out more information, but those are all the details he gave me.

Later, G dug some more information out -- that he had cut himself earlier in the day and he had to put a bandaid on the cut. ...And that's when everything clicked. A "gray" shriveled thumb under a soggy bandaid. Frostbite, of course.

Don't you just wish you were the school nurse?!

That day G had packed some leftover olives in his lunch. He also included a lunch note with the following joke and a picture to go along with it. "There were two olives sitting on a curb. One falls off. The other asks if he's OK. The first says, 'I'll live.'"

Buddy is a very literal child, so I asked him if he "got" the note. And this is what he said: "Oh yes, of course I got it. Daddy wrote me that note because he loves me so much. He doesn't want me to fall down and die, but if I do, he knows I'll be resurrected."

It took every single ounce of control I have to not laugh hysterically. Who in the world would over-think an olive joke? (Buddy would, that's who.)

Then he said, "Cause I'll live again. I'll live... olive. Oh. Now I get it."

We're Full of Inspiration Here

2011-05-18T09:26:00.000-07:00

If I had video for this story, I would make it into one of those tear-jerker inspiring youtube videos. Since I don't, you'll just have to read about what happened.

Buddy has a lot of energy, but is not athletic. I knew he needed the discipline and confidence boost of being part of a team this spring, but playing on a team stresses him out and makes me want to pull my hair out. So after a lot of thought, we decided he would benefit from running with the track club in town. It's low key, he doesn't have to be aggressive or compete against anybody else, per se. This has turned out to be a great decision.

The track meets are brutally long, so he's only participated in the home meets this season, but the first one went pretty well. He did the long jump, plus the 1500 and the 100. He is definitely not a sprinter, and we knew he would do best at the longer run, although he was really nervous. Although there were lots of kids in his age group at the track meet, only two kids participated in the 1500. He ended up getting the 2nd place ribbon. Although he's no dummy (and knew he came in last), he was still proud of his performance. And we were so proud of him too!

Last weekend he had his second track meet. This time he was a super nervous, knowing what to expect. He competed in the long jump, mini javelin, plus did the 1500 again and the 400. Once again he was most nervous about the 1500 and kept saying he didn't want to do it. The day before he had spent the afternoon laying on the couch with a really bad headache and a little bit of a tummy ache. He woke up fine, but as the race got closer he was almost doubled over in pain. I assumed it was nerves, so we encouraged him and gave him a big pep talk. I reminded him of the talk we had been having all week about setting goals, finishing what we start, beating his time, having fun, and being a good sport.

You can tell he's extremely nervous here. And to put into perspective how much younger/smaller he was... the boy on the left is the other kid in his age group. Yes, you are seeing that right. That 8 (?) year old is a foot taller.

Once again, only two boys ages 7-8 were competing in the race, so they put them in a heat with much older kids. As Buddy sized up his competition he said he wouldn't and couldn't do it. He said there was no way he could keep up with the bigger boys. We forced him to stand at the starting line to get ready. The gun fired and off he went. Quickly the older boys were far in the lead. As Buddy finished his 3rd lap (holding his tummy in pain), the older boys were finishing the race. He assumed that since they all were done, he was too, so he stopped. When all the finish-line officials yelled at him to keep going, he did. As he rounded the last corner into the straightaway to the finish, he was the only boy left on the track. Everyone standing along the track started cheering for him. All the people in the stands started cheering for him. And he finished.

All 15 of the boys at the starting line. Buddy is second from the end.

He got his 2nd place ribbon and as we hugged him and told him how proud we were, he said, "My tummy hurt so bad, but I remembered what you said about not quitting during races. So I didn't stop. And I did it!" I was teary telling him, "All those people were cheering for YOU!" I know this is sounding so dramatic, but it really was an incredible moment.

His time was 8:06. Last time he was 7:47, so he was a bit slower this time. But considering the nerves, the tummy ache, and the snafu after the third lap, nobody is complaining.

I finished!

Everyone cheered because who doesn't love an underdog?! Who doesn't love to watch the smallest kid finish the race? Who doesn't love to watch a little person kick fear to the curb? The remarkable thing about this story, though, is how much fear and anxiety he did manage to kick to the curb. He had a rough week leading up to the race. And actually had a much worse week after. But now we have this small victory to fall back on. Buddy, do you remember that time you didn't give up? Do you remember that time you were scared but did it anyway? Do you remember that time hundreds of people cheered just for you?

P.S. A few minutes after finishing that race, he did the 400. He came in 7th out of 8 kids -- all his age. The kid who came in last was in tears, so Buddy tried to comfort him. And later that night he prayed for the boy that he would realize it's most important just to finish and try to beat your time. His tummy ache was excruciating that night, making me feel so bad I made him race -- but extra proud of his effort.

Girl's Weekend

2011-05-17T21:24:00.000-07:00

I only took two pictures the entire weekend. This was one of them. The other is at the bottom of the post.

I'm way behind on blogging. I'll probably never catch up, but I couldn't let my amazing Girl's Weekend to Seattle go un-discussed. Nicki, Christy, Bethany, and I went to Timeout for Women, but most importantly, we got away to relax, shop, and eat good food. Some highlights:

The conference was fabulous. I learned a lot and was very inspired to be better, not necessarily to do more.
Conversation with my girls was fabulous and inspiring as well.
Supporting each other through hard times. And good times.
The food. Oh my heavens did we eat well. I know no one else cares, but I'm going to document what we ate, just because it all was so noteworthy. Friday lunch: Famous Daves. Friday night: Room service. Saturday lunch: The most incredible Brazilian sandwich imaginable (pork and pineapple sandwich with cilantro sauce) -- we scored for FREE because they took so long bringing our food. Saturday dinner: Cuban vaca frita, probably one of my all-time favorite dishes. Sunday lunch: Mediterranean. Sunday dinner: Fabulous hamburgers.
While we were at dinner we heard the announcement that Osama Bid Laden had been killed. Let Freedom Ring!
Shopping. What girl's weekend would be complete without some shopping?
Sleeping in on Sunday morning.
Traveling stress-free with Christy behind the wheel.
The beautiful weather.
The time Christy tripped over somebody's cardboard box home.

Mother's Day 2011

2011-05-09T21:42:00.000-07:00

I know plenty of women who don't love Mother's Day. I can totally understand, but it really makes me sad. Personally, I adore Mother's Day. I love sleeping in, laying in bed as much as I want, taking the day off, not cooking or cleaning, not putting the kids to bed, receiving handmade cards from the boys, getting an amazing truffle in church, getting hugs and kisses all day long, getting compliments and pampering from G, bragging about how awesome my boys are, thinking about the two wonderful women who gave me the blessing of motherhood, thinking about the incredible women in my life including my own mother, my mother-in-law, my sister, my sisters-in-law, my friends, my friends who are infertile but would/and will make the best mothers in the world. In fact, I think it's safe to say it's my favorite day of the whole year.

This year was particularly interesting because Buddy and I have been on the rocks lately. Things have been brutal between me and him for a few months now and a few times this week he's pushed my patience to the absolute brink (and beyond, but who's measuring). He came down with some mysterious abdominal pain on Friday and spent the next three days (including Mother's Day) calm and pleasant. It was nothing short of a blessing. Pure ecstasy. A gift. I love that boy every day. But oh how I love him when he's calm. We spent a ton of time together this weekend playing games, doing science projects, reading together, and chatting about small and big things. Saturday night I laid in bed with him for two hours past his bedtime. He just laid and talked to me. He didn't wiggle, he didn't argue, he didn't talk loud. Happy Mother's Day to me...

And then Sunday got even better. I watched part of The View on Friday and they were talking about how a lot of women hate Mother's Day because they have experienced a loss that makes the day difficult. Then they mentioned how cool it would be if those women that are feeling down about the holiday could look outside themselves and give help to a single mom or mother with a deployed husband. I know that's probably not easy advice to hear when you are feeling a loss, but as someone who has spent a few Mother's Days wishing to be a mother, I thought about what a blessing I could have been to someone who could have used a real break from her responsibilities on that day. Makes sense, doesn't it? I want to mother... and people deserve a break from mothering. A perfect combo that benefits everyone.

I had been thinking all weekend how I could help a mother that needed a break (and still give myself the break I was anticipating). And that's when G really outdid himself by giving me a great day. After church he invited my two closest friends and their kids over to our house. He threw together a brief FHE on priesthood blessings, then he and a friend gave my dear friend and her kids beautiful blessings of comfort, as they are going through a really hard time. She's got a lot on her plate as a mother, and it was the least we could do to support her. I am so proud and thankful that G honors womanhood, and supports me and my friends in the ups and downs of our responsibilities. It honestly was the best gift he could have given me. The best part, though, is after the blessings we threw together an impromptu potluck, with everyone returning quickly to their homes to bring over the food they had in crockpots at home. Later G did all the dishes and finished the night giving me a blessing. Talk about a perfect day.

I think we've started a new tradition of looking for ways to honor and support the women in our lives who need Mother's Day most.

Oh, and the other tradition I'm starting next year is taking a current picture of me with the kids, since the most recent picture I have with both the boys was taken 14 months ago (see above).

Trump or Monkey

2011-04-28T13:39:00.000-07:00

Years ago we used to love a David Letterman segment called "Trump or Monkey" Dave would show a tightly cropped picture of hair, and the lucky contestant would have to decide if it was Donald Trump's hair or a monkey's hair. It was hilarious and was actually more difficult than it sounds. The contestants usually got the answer wrong.

We've got our own little Trump or Monkey among us. We've always struggled to find a decent hairstyle for Sambo, because he's got a square head, a gigantic forehead, and extremely fine hair. But it wasn't until the other day when I was scrolling through some old photos of him, did I realize just how bad things were at times.

Unfortunately I didn't get a picture of Sambo at my friend Nicki's house yesterday. He wanted his hair up in a rubberband like her daughters. And then he got genuinely mad when I took it out to go to Costco. Since he already looks like a girl, I figured having his hair in a rubberband would be a bad idea out in public.

And, not to leave Buddy out... he has crazy hair too. He actually has really great hair, but it's extremely thick and wavy and is difficult to tame. He hasn't had a haircut in awhile, and he desperately needs one. I bribed him to let me take the following picture the other day. He would be mortified if he knew I was posting it on the www. He made me promise "I wouldn't show it to any of my friends." But it's just too awesome not to share.

Crazy hair aside, they are both just adorable!

License to Practice What?

2011-04-22T19:42:00.000-07:00

This week my neighbor told me that a conversation she had with Buddy "got her right out of her winter depression." Buddy is hilarious, I'll admit. But let me tell you about a situation that got me right out of my winter depression.

As a member of the Oregon State Bar, G is part of a listserve that received an email this week about a continuing education course. Apparently the listserve had some issues because anytime anyone replied to the email to ask a question about the course or to request they "take me off this list," the reply got sent to everyone. So over the course of a day, G -- and everyone else on the list -- got approximately 60 emails from people who were irritated they had received the original email. Apparently those same people were not irritated by the 60 followup emails.

G told me about the situation I seriously doubled over laughing hysterically at all the awesome replies that people sent out. I found it so incredibly funny... and ironic.

Keep in mind, only members of the Bar received the email, which means these people were smart enough to go to law school, graduate from law school, take the Bar, then pass the Oregon Bar. So in theory, these people should be smart.

But not smart enough to notice the instructions for unsubscribing at the bottom of the email.

Interestingly enough, the first line of the original email read, "Please share this information widely with your colleagues and networks."

Dear Folks Who Wrote the Original Email: consider that task done. And done well.

Let me share with you the awesome replies. G deleted a few of the original ones before I begged him to save them for my enjoyment. (All typos are from the original emails.)

Please remove me from this mailing list.
I am afraid someone has the wrong email address.
Maybe this will help: wiki.answers.com/Q/What_is_the_difference_between_reply_and_reply_all
I believe I was sent thid email by mistake.
Please remove me from this list.
Since when do I have a say in CLE credit approval? Please send only to those concerned.
Why am I receiving these e-mails?
Remove me from this list please
Please remove me from your list.
Why am I receiving these e-mails?
And it’s on!
Rather than getting a bunch more of these, I would like to point out that instructions on how to remove yourself are at the bottom….
Please remove me from all mailing lists.
Please remove me.
ditto
Remove my email address immediately please.
Anybody want to educate the rest of us, what the hell is going on here?
Please take me off your e-mail list.
Please remove me from this list
Please also remove me from this list immediately.
Out of courtesy for other victims of this list, please direct your unsubscribe requests to the OMA address as I did, not to the entire “list” address, as others have.
Please remove me from this mailing list.
Please promptly remove me from this list, whatever it is. Thank you.
I am assigning this list to my junk mail folder.
Why am I receiving these e-mails?
Please remove me too.
Please take me off this list
Please remove me from this list.
I DID NOT send this to anyone. I received one too.
Please remove my name as well.

At the risk of perpetuating this e-mail once more but in hopes of stopping them from overwhelming everyone’s e-mail inbox, please:Do NOT hit “reply all” to this e-mail. Your are replying to a list serve address which causes your e-mail to be distributed to everyone on that list. If you wish to e-mail someone at the bar or the OMA please e-mail them directly; and

If you do not want to receive the e-mails advertising programs from the bar in the future, please use the “unsubscribe” links at the bottom of the original e-mail. Federal law gives the sender 10 business days to remove you from the list.

This is a Mailman list. You need to change the following setting so that replies are sent to the administrator of the list only and are not sent to everyone on the list. Go to the list administration menu. Choose General Options. Change the following setting to "Poster". Where are replies to list messages directed? Poster is strongly recommended for most mailing lists.

To everyone on this list: Please, let's just stop replying to this chain of email. To anyone who wants to unsubscribe: Please follow the instructions, which are posted at the bottom of every email. Please do not just hit Reply. Thank you. I am merely offering advice. I do not in any way control this list.Stop REPLYING PLEASE

Dear Colleagues: I respectfully ask that you immediately remove my name from the E-Mail lists which have spawned this unwanted contact. Thank you for your kind assistance.

Please remove me from this list immediately
Everybody!! Stop hitting "Reply All" and instead set up a mailbox "rule" to filter the subject line "[oregon_bar]" and set the rule to automatically place all future messages in the trash.
Remove me also
Please stop hitting reply all.
Please remove us as well.
Please remove me from the list.
Please remove me from this/these lists. Much appreciated
Please remove me from this list. Thank you.
Why am I getting this? Please remove me from this forward. Thank you

Skiing (by G)

2011-04-13T22:11:00.000-07:00

We've already shared a few things that we did over spring break. However, one particular event was one of the absolute highlights of the trip. Typically, Reno in spring is usually full of blue skies and sunshine. This time, however, we were met with wind, rain, and snow. We did have a small break in the weather on a Tuesday, so my dad and I loaded up our skis and brought along something that we hadn't ever brought before: Buddy!

I was eight years old when I first started skiing and so I'd been itching to get Buddy up on the hill. My dad was equally excited to have Buddy start. We drove up to Mt. Rose and enrolled him in a two-hour lesson. When we first rented his equipment, we had enough time for one run before we had to eat a quick lunch and get to the lesson. Buddy, true to form, wanted to go down the hill all by himself right from the start. We helped him down the hill and then dropped him off for his lesson.

My dad and I skied in the meantime and got a lot of runs in. My plantar fasciitis was causing my feet to hurt in my ski boots, but I was still having fun. Once the lesson got over, we met Buddy and made a couple more runs with him. The first run was a little rough, but on the second run, he did phenomenal. I can't even begin to describe how much fun it was to see my oldest son cruising down the mountain on skis. Skiing and snowboarding have been a lifelong passion for me and my dad. I'm glad that I can pass that on to Buddy. Unfortunately, because of the weather we weren't able to go again in Reno, but we will definitely go again here.

I Want To Remember These Quirks

2011-04-08T15:12:00.000-07:00

Buddy gets a lot of air time on the ol' blog because he says and does a lot of funny stuff. But this little boy deserves a shout-out too. I have often said that one of Sambo's talents is being adorable. He is just so cute, I can hardly stand it. I could just kiss his cheeks and watch him play all day. He says the cutest things and those big eyes... I'm a sucker for this kid and I can't help myself. He's a handful at times, but he is just so dang cute the rest of the time I quickly forget about his crazy shenanigans.

I really hope I always remember how he is at age 3. This documentation will help:

He is a major hypochondriac. He always thinks he's "sick" and begs -- BEGS -- to go to the doctor, get medicine, or get a bandaid. A couple days ago he cracked into the children's ibuprofen we left on the bathroom counter and drank the rest of the bottle because he was "sick." Thank goodness there was only about an ounce in the bottle, so no harm was done. But that was our first call to Poison Control. Yesterday I had a dermatologist appointment and as soon as he realized I was going to the doctor he came down with a horrible "illness" too and said he needed to go to the doctor too and he wanted a shot. (What kid wants a shot?!) While we were in the waiting room he cuddled up to me and laid in my arms like a little invalid moaning that his tummy hurt "really bad." All to convince me he needed to see the doctor. Additionally, my neck has been bothering me so I've been putting a hot rice pack around it throughout the day. He's jealous of this, so now unfortunately his neck, leg, and tummy all "hurt" too. So now we have to take turns using the rice pack.
"Child Proof" means nothing to this kid. We've thought of changing his name to Houdini because he can get in or out of anything. (See above with the medicine.) Luckily he's not terribly curious or we'd have a lot more problems. He was barely walking when he started climbing out of his crib. Those door childlocks never have kept him in his room (he had one on his door the morning he drank the medicine). And it was a year ago that he first started hopping over the large gate at the top of our very steep stairs and climbing out of his 5-point harness carseat. Today he opened the car door while we were driving for probably the 20th time. The first time it happened we were on the freeway. I'm trying to be better about locking the car, although he also knows how to unlock the door.
He loves the color orange and especially loves his orange pumpkin socks. He wears them anytime they are clean. If I fold and put away the laundry, guaranteed he will find those socks and wear them. Last night I laid them out with a clean set of clothes for today. And when I checked on him before I went to bed, they were already on his feet.
He loooooooves his big brother. This week he started saying he "misses" Buddy when he's at school and he says it every day now. It hurts his feelings if Buddy forgets to kiss him before school and is in a foul mood until Buddy gets home and apologizes.
He doesn't need a nap most of the time, but if he does go to sleep he wakes up in a really bad mood. It's not at all worth it.
He falls asleep super easily in the car and if he naps in the car, he doesn't wake up in a bad mood.
He is fiercely independent. In his mind, life has to be fair. If Buddy gets to do something he doesn't or can't, then all hell breaks loose. As long as I let him do things himself and do things Buddy gets to do, he is almost always extremely happy and pleasant to be around. If not, oh boy. Watch out. (As an oldest child myself, I know this is extremely annoying. Luckily Buddy doesn't seem to mind at all.)
His best friends are Connor and of course, Buddy. He would play with Connor every day if I'd arrange it.
He'll do pretty much anything I ask of him in order to get the amazing privilege of opening the garage door. I can motivate him to hurry and get his coat and shoes on when we need to go somewhere, if I let him push the button to open the garage.
He loves to sing. Even if he doesn't know the words, he belts out his own words. ADORABLE. You should hear him during sacrament meeting. Oh man I hope he never stops singing like that.
He also loves to color and do "homework" like his brother. I'd estimate he spends three hours a day on average coloring and doing homework sheets. He loves it. If I'm doing something on the couch, he cuddles next to me with his blanket on his lap and his workbook. When I get ready in the morning he brings a workbook into the bathroom. His interest is very much art, though, and not academics. He's the first artist in our family, so I'm totally fine with that.
He uses the word "no" generously. He does not do what he doesn't want to do. Period. Unless you motivate him with the garage door, or some other equally exciting activity that makes him feel like he's a big boy. And then he's the most agreeable child in the world.
He eats yogurt almost every day for lunch.
Whenever I give myself a treat, he asks me why I "need" it. (Buddy told him a few weeks ago that I deserve treats.) So now I've got my own personal food police. It's awfully hard to explain to a 3-year old why a mother would NEED a treat.
Even though I've got almost endless patience for this child, he likes G a LOT more than he likes me. It makes no sense and is starting to make me mad actually. Oh well, I can't stay mad at him for very long.

Date Night

2011-04-07T20:19:00.000-07:00

While in Reno, G and I kicked up our heels and went out just the two of us a few times.

One of the dates in particular was one of the best we've had in our years of marriage. We started out spending and hour or so shopping at an outdoor shopping mall. A snowstorm was starting, so we were pretty much the only people there. Then we headed over to Grimaldi's, or very favorite pizza place. Again, the weather probably contributed, but we were almost the only people there so we got our food quickly. A far cry from the couple-hour wait we had when we went for the first time in New York. Our waiter was impressed at how quickly we polished off a large pizza. And that we had been to the original Grimaldi's. In fact, when we were done we were craving more and we were "this close" to ordering another one. We found out that they oxidize their water to be just like Brooklyn's water, and they use the same ingredients as they do in New York, so the pizza is exactly the same. Heavenly, I tell you.

We had scheduled ourselves quite awhile for dinner, so we had a long time to spare, so we figured we'd wander around the El Dorado casino, before picking up our tickets to the "Buddy Holly" show. They have free valet parking there, so we enjoyed that nice convenience! When we got into the casino we found the sports bar to watch the final minutes of the BYU//Florida game. When we arrived about 40 TV's were tuned to another game, and one lonely TV was tuned to the BYU game. But when the game went to overtime they put the game onto the big screen. G and I figured we were probably the only two BYU fans watching from a bar. But actually quite a few other folks around us were cheering the Cougs on too. The difference was they were drunk off their rears and were clutching worn papers. Presumably their March Madness brackets. So we were the only true* BYU fans/grads there. Unless a whole bunch of folks became drunks since graduation. We also remarked at the irony and awkwardness of the repeated f-bombs we heard all around as as Jimmer missed like ten 3-pointers in a row, and BYU ultimately lost.

*We're not true fans either. This was the only game we anticipated or watched all season. We care enormously when they win but we don't really watch them play. Or watch any sports for that matter.

So after we got over being sad about the loss, we headed for the theater to watch the show. As awkward as the sports bar was, we cannot express how hilariously awkward it was to walk up to the theater only to realize we were at least 40 years younger than the next youngest person there. Apparently Buddy Holly fans are in their 70's or older. Seeing how he was the rage in the late 50's, I guess that would make sense.

This is the worst picture ever, but I wanted you to get a sense of what I mean when I say we stuck out like a sore thumb.

The performance was fabulous, fun, and entertaining. The actor playing Buddy Holly was great, and boy did the folks in the audience get excited about the music. They danced and hollered like a bunch of teenagers. G's parents went a few nights later and said they had a frail 80-pound lady near them that moved the entire time. Ken said that if she had osteoporosis she would have resulted in a pile of dust by the end. The two people on either side of us were toe-tapping, clapping, and singing the entire time. It was so incredibly entertaining to feel the enthusiasm of the crowd.

At one point there was a costume malfunction for one of the guys on stage (his pants came unbuttoned) and the lady next to me about came unglued. Like a teenager if Justin Beiber's pants came unbuttoned on stage. She laughed and blushed and leaned over to me and asked me if I saw what happened. We saw her later after the show in the lobby and she was still laughing and blushing like a little school girl. She flagged me down and asked me yet again (for the 10th time) if I saw it.

When we sat down we noticed there were some extra large seats right behind us. They were special seats for people on oxygen we discovered a few minutes later -- when several people rolled their oxygen tanks in. Not to mention, there was Jazzy parking near the entrance of the theater. I'm not kidding.

To say we had a fabulous time would be a huge understatement. We were so glad we went!

The show ended by 8:30, which is early by our standards and by Reno's. We wanted to make sure the children were good and asleep before we arrived back, so we decided to drive around the strip, then head out for dessert. Unfortunately the snow was really coming down, so a few of the restaurants we looked into were closing early, so we found Applebees and totally overdid it on some appetizers before finally going home.

I mentioned in an earlier post how great it is to be able to go out without paying a babysitter or having to clean up after the babysitter. It was so nice to get out and know the boys were fine (even if the grandparents were a little worse for the wear.)

7-Up Incident

2011-04-04T20:58:00.000-07:00

Today I got a message from Buddy's teacher that said, "Hi. I'm calling because we had a little incident at school today with Buddy. He has been the model student for the past month, ever since we last talked. I've implemented several of our ideas and they are totally working. Except today he's been really off. It wasn't a huge deal, but I thought I should let you know because he'll probably come home upset. He was goofing off during work time and I had to talk to him sternly twice because he was trying to get his friends to laugh and just wouldn't stop. He eventually did and apologized and everything is great. Just wanted you to know."

I wasn't too shook up about it, but I did find odd, as did the teacher, that he would act out today. For the next few minutes before Buddy got home I was reviewing what could have possibly set him off today.

When he came home he told me about what happened right away, and I praised him profusely for his honesty. He said the kids thought he was really funny and he just couldn't stop himself from goofing off. Then he said he was absolutely starving and needed a big snack.

As he helped himself to a snack, I asked him if he'd eaten his lunch today since he was so hungry. (He has only not eaten his lunch one other time this year.) He said he couldn't finish it because... "OH MY GOSH, MOM! DAD GAVE ME SODA IN MY WATER BOTTLE TODAY!"

I noticed G putting soda (10 ounces to be exact) in his water bottle last night and cautioned him that I thought it was a bad idea. Every time he makes Buddy's lunch, he always puts a surprise in there. Usually a note as well as a small treat of some kind. Today he decided soda would be a good/fun idea. Everybody knows Buddy does not need soda. "Have you met our son?"

"Buddy, when did you get in trouble today? Was it before or after lunch?"

"After," he said.

I immediately emailed Buddy's father and strongly encouraged him to use better judgment next time he packs the lunch.

P.S. Speaking of school lunches, check out this blog. It's one of G's college friends. We think he is really clever and has been the inspiration for G's "fun" lunches.

Biggest Little City

2011-03-30T12:14:00.000-07:00

Spring Break was marvelous -- just as we hoped. We went to Reno to visit G's parents. G went to ski Reno's snow one last time before his parents move away and I went to sit around.

Some of the low points before I get to all the highlights:

The weather. It was snowy, windy and cold the entire time. The ski resort was closed most of the time we were there because of all the wind. The only day they made it up to the mountain it was 6 degrees!
For some reason the boys attention-seek, disobey, and ignore everything I say when we are out of the normal routine. Thank goodness they don't act like that every day.
The boys came home with their first colds of the winter. I guess we should be relieved that we made it this long...
The guilt over all that food we consumed. Oh mercy, did we eat!

The highlights:

We had no incidents on the drive there are back! We did have to take an alternate route home to avoid a snowstorm, which helped us avoid any weather-related problems. We also avoided hitting any wild animals, car accidents, tickets, dramatic visits with potential birth moms, and vomiting. The first incident-free road trip in years!
The Grassroots Bookstore. Every time we go to Reno G and I go and load up on used books.
G and I went on THREE dates!!!! The first was to the bookstore and Walmart. The next was to dinner and a show (more on that in another blog post), and the last was to dessert at Claim Jumper. Going out without children is heavenly. Especially when we don't have to pay a babysitter or clean up after a babysitter when we come home.
The kids slept in until 8:30 -- and often later -- every single day.
G took his remote-control helicopter and had fights with his dad, who also has a remote-control helicopter.

Reading for hours every day. I really wanted to sit around and read all week. And I did. (At your earliest convenience please read the book "These Is My Words by Nancy Turner. One of my all-time favorite books now. But not if you are a boy because you'll think it is really lame.)
G took Buddy skiing for the first time. They had a fabulous time, of course. More to come on that.
Eating non-stop. In-n-Out twice. Atlantis Buffet. Strawberry/Orange Julius's every night. Einstein Bagels twice. Grimaldi's. Val's great dinners.
Val's all-fruit smoothies. Buddy actually asked her if he could get the recipe since I always add vegetables to the ones I make. It was like smoothie nirvana for the kids and G.
Ken's breakfasts every morning. We never make a fancy breakfast at home. And if we do, it's for dinner.
Buddy's hike with grandpa. He's still talking about it. The boy was born to hike.
The kids playing in the snow. Sambo had never built a snowman before and Buddy has only a few times.

Having grandma and grandpa around to play with the kids.
The kids telling knock-knock jokes on the way home. Except Sambo kept getting confused and would say, "Ding-dong..." to get the joke started.
Putting together 500-piece puzzles. I love puzzles and hadn't done one in years!
Circus Circus with the kids.

Buddy has chronic nosebleeds even though he's had both sides cauterized. His bleeds are severe and once he starts a cycle, it's several days or weeks before they stop. He always starts a new cycle in Reno, but thanks to a new-to-us product called Ponaris, he didn't get any this time! He just finished a cycle a few weeks ago, so we thought for sure they would be a problem in Reno. Three cheers for Ponaris!
One day I tried to get Sambo to take a nap, which is a losing battle nearly every time, so I don't even try usually. This particular day we all needed a break. I thought he had fallen asleep, but with very few items in his closet-bed to work with, he got creative. He took his underwear and jacket off, put his shirt on like a "skirt" and put his pants on his head. That's how I found him! Who knows how long he had sat there like that. Three hours maybe?

Dad Makes Dinner (by G)

2011-03-16T20:59:00.000-07:00

Tonight M had a Relief Society Dinner that she was forced to attend. It was just me and the boys and we were all getting hungry. I do not enjoy cooking at all. M says that I'm good at it, but I really know it's reverse psychology to try to get me to do it more often. I also do not enjoy cleaning up after cooking. Basically, I only enjoy looking at food and eating it. Tonight I was on my own in the kitchen, so I prepared a meal that was tasty and did not require a lot of prep or clean up. In the spirit of all of those food websites, here is the finished product:

Open-faced Toasted Fried Egg Sandwiches with Cheese and Pickled Okra on the side.

Buddy enjoyed it.

Sambo, after doing his own hair for dinner, also liked it. Take that, Pioneer Woman! You can email me if you want the recipe.

We've Made Our Bed and Now We Have to Lie in It

2011-03-16T14:57:00.000-07:00

We're celebrating 13 years of marriage next month and to celebrate, we got a bed. The first 9 or 10 years of marriage we were too poor to buy optional furniture. We got a halfway decent mattress finally three years ago but it's been on a cheap frame. Shortly after we got married we bought a couple TV trays from Walmart and those have been our nightstands.

Year after year we've talked about getting a bed and have looked around quite a bit, but we never really fell in love with anything and then we got sidetracked buying furniture for the kids, kitchen, and family room.

A few months ago I decided enough is enough. I'm ready to choose a bed. I love to shop and I love having a nicely decorated home, but I can't create a vision in my mind. Creating that vision is pure torture for me. I have to actually see the piece before I know it's what I want. I am also extremely indecisive and really picky too. It's really a problem actually. (Ask my friends! Ask my husband!)

This is why it's taken us 13 years.

A few months ago I became bound and determined. I wanted a deep brown sleigh bed. But then some friends suggested I avoid a footboard, which would detract from the big window and a really pretty dresser near the window. I loved that suggestion. So then I chose a few options without a footboard. Then I decided I didn't love them. And I picked a few more out. Then a friend suggested a metal bed. I hemmed and hawed about that one for a few weeks but decided it was too casual and I didn't want to rest my back on metal bars when I watch the 11:00 news every night -- although I really liked it and might consider it eventually for our guest room. I love the look of light fabric and leather together, so I started to think that's what I really wanted. So I picked out a few leather beds. G and I were in a deadlock -- him liking one leather bed and me liking another. The saleslady suggested one more option -- an almost black leather bed. I knew immediately it was the one.

I went from brown sleigh. To brown not-sleigh. To metal. To brown leather. To black leather.

It was delivered yesterday and I'm head over heels in love. I am crazy about it!

(The nightstands not so much, but at least they are better than TV stands.)

Climb Every Mountain

2011-03-11T18:01:00.000-08:00

I got a lot done this week. Got our taxes together. Got all caught up on the ironing for probably the first time in 3-4 years. Got the house relatively clean. Got the whites folded today right when they came out of the dryer. Read a really good book. Got to the gym as many times as I wanted.

Most importantly, I learned two very important lessons. One: fasting works. And two: you shouldn't make decisions when you are climbing a mountain. I learned that listening to an interview with two prominent Church leaders and marathon runners. Profound, I tell you. Consider all the ways that applies to your life right now. Let me say that again:

You shouldn't make decisions when you are climbing a mountain.

Lest you think the week was totally awesome. My 3-year old is currently screaming in his room because he got left behind when daddy and brother went to the elementary school carnival this evening. I asked the boys to clean their rooms. One brother obeyed, the little one didn't. So he didn't get to go.

G thinks I'm super mean and keeps telling me he wants to start spoiling our kids because he's tired of disappointing them and making them cry. I don't think it's mean at all. I think parents that spoil their kids are mean because they set their kids up to be the frustrating adults I keep running across.

When G gets home from the carnival I'm going to tell him he can't make any parenting decisions (including changing our designated parenting course) when climbing a mountain. And teaching our baby how to clean up after himself is definitely going to be like climbing a mountain.

Postedit: I just put Sambo to bed. He prayed that he could make his family happy and clean up his room. I think he learned a valuable lesson too this week.

Things That Make You Go Hmmmm

2011-03-09T13:20:00.000-08:00

Maybe I'm the weird one, but it seems I keep running across a lot of idiots. Is someone trying to prepare me for the Ides of March? Here's a few examples.

I have been working on painting and decorating Sambo's room. I hunted high and low for the perfect sheets and finally found some on Target.com. The website said they had them in-store too, but after visiting three stores, that proved untrue. So I ordered them online. A different set of sheets came a few days later. I called and worked out a plan to return them and have the correct sheets re-sent. A few days later the wrong ones arrived again. So I called customer service again and the lady told me to return the wrong sheets for a full refund. I said, that's great. Except how do I get the right sheets? Are they even in stock? She said they had plenty in stock, but the people in charge of filling orders would probably make a mistake a third time, so I should probably just look for new sheets. I explained how I've already looked for other sheets and those are perfect for what I'm looking for. She said maybe in a few weeks once I get my refund I could try to re-order them again online and see what happens.

We got different health insurance a few months ago. It's proved to be one frustration after another. But I try not to complain because I am grateful we have health insurance. That is, if we ever get anything covered. One of my providers informed me that my claims from this year will all be denied because I didn't get pre-authorization for the services. And because the service I've been receiving is one of their exclusions. The benefit booklet I have doesn't say anything about any of that. So I called the insurance customer service and the lady reassured me that the provider had his information wrong. So my provider called the insurance a second time and he was told he was right. I called a second time and spent thirty minutes on the phone asking a ton of questions and writing verbatim what the exclusions are (my service isn't one of them). I reported back to my provider who said we'll just have to wait and see what happens as they process all the claims. But he told me to prep for some hefty bills because he fears all the claims will be denied. Who's the idiot here?

I was dropping Buddy off at school the other morning. The temperature gauge on my car read 36 degrees, which is really cold for Portland, especially this time of year. I noticed all the middle school boys were either wearing shorts or short sleeves without coats. Of the 100 or so boys I saw, not a single one had a coat on. So are coats totally out of style for tween/teen boys?

And these guys aren't idiots, but they are odd:

Speaking of Sambo's new bedroom, he slept in a sleeping bag in our closet for almost a month while I painted. (I'll tell the story later about why it took so long to paint the room.) He LOVED this arrangement and slept incredibly well, probably because it's quiet and dark. We finally got him a twin mattress and have been trying to get him to sleep in it. But he now prefers the floor, so every night he rips the mattress cover off the bed, throws everything on the floor and sleeps there.

My boys are both hypochondriacs and love going to the doctor. At least ten times a day Sambo comes to me with some new owie and if I ask if he needs a kiss, he tells me no, he needs to go the doctor. They both beg and beg me to take them there. Who loves the doctor? And why aren't they understanding that we can't AFFORD to take them to the doctor? (See above!)

Buddy loves scary movies (scary by a 7-year old's standards). And since Sambo does whatever his older brother does, he loves all those movies too. However, Sambo is terrified of typical kid movies: "Stuart Little," "Cars," and "Spirit." He cries hysterically during them and up until this week I haven't been able to figure out what it is about those movies that bothers him. Turns out he's scared of being chased. I realized this because when G flies his remote control helicopter around, Sambo hides under the table and recently started verbalizing that he doesn't want to be chased by it -- even if G isn't. I realized that he cries during a race on "Cars" and when one little creature was chasing another (playfully) in "Stuart Little," and when the horse was running really fast in "Spirit." But bring on the monsters in Harry Potter because those don't bother him a bit.

Honor

2011-03-07T16:31:00.000-08:00

Buddy's 1st grade teacher had a baby the second week of school. So he had a substitute the first 5 months of school. The sub has been phenomenal. She has the perfect personality to teach Buddy. She is sassy and has a ton of energy. She's really funny and knows what kids like. She has high academic standards. She is also not afraid to call or email me when Buddy acts up or does good at school. And most importantly, she's taken an interest in the kids, even though she was the sub. I really like that about her.

Buddy loved all these things about her too. He really responded to her re-directing him and considered her a great friend. At Christmas he agonized over what to give her. Eventually, he picked out two of his favorite rocks from his collection and wrapped them up for her. She responded with a sincere thank you note telling him how much she and her boys love rocks -- sent to our home during Christmas break.

So we all stressed about the "real" teacher coming back. A couple weeks before she came back we received a note from the principal that the real teacher and the sub had worked out a job-share sort of arrangement. I was so happy and Buddy was overjoyed. The real teacher would take Mondays and Tuesdays and the sub would take Thursdays and Fridays and they'd trade off on Wednesdays.

Except it turned out, Buddy didn't like the real teacher. He would huff and puff every morning that she was going to teach and then come home in a bad mood those days. I only had met her once, and I wasn't impressed. She seemed like a great teacher and had an excellent handle on the class. She has experience teaching, but she was an awkward fit for Buddy. She's soft spoken and sings songs to motivate the kids. He hates singing. She expects good listening and being quiet and showing respect at all times and he is physically incapable of keeping his mouth shut. It's never going to happen and her repeated sending him to his desk to put his head down was NOT working.

After a good month, he started saying he didn't like her and he was sure she didn't like him. So I sent her a friendly email last week expressing my concerns about him (not her) and asking her for the real story on his behavior.

She emailed me immediately requesting a phone call.

To summarize the phone call... it couldn't have gone better. Apparently she loves him and there are absolutely no behavior problems. I was shocked at how helpful she was in explaining how things have really been going at school. She never once got defensive. She gave me plenty of time to talk. She also expressed sincere desire to get to know him better so he could trust her, like he does the sub. We formulated a secret code she'll give him when he's talking too much, to spare him the embarrassment of putting his head down at his seat. She asked if he'd like to meet her baby, and we arranged to meet her in the hall after their music concert next week so he can hold her baby. And last, she said she wanted to let him borrow her favorite book of all time, "The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe" so they could talk about it and share something special, just the two of them.

I was floored at her willingness to care about my boy.

You should have seen him when he came home today. She had lent him the book all wrapped up like a little present with a note. He said, "You should have seen how nice she was to me today! She brought me a present. For me and no one else! She does like me. You were right!"

He said she didn't even have to use the secret code to remind him to be quiet because he was so happy that she likes him.

If we had stayed in our old house he would have gone to a different school. I hear wonderful things about that school too. But this is where he belongs. He needs these specific teachers. I am so impressed -- and thankful.

* * *

And I am also so proud -- and thankful -- to be part of the BYU alumni this week. I love that fame, money, prestige, convenience, pride, and sex all are secondary to honor at BYU. I know it's cliche to say, but everything good I have came because I went to BYU. Everything.

Hogwarts Express

2011-03-04T15:52:00.000-08:00

I totally forgot to blog about our last minute trip to Seattle a couple weeks ago! We heard about a Harry Potter exhibition at the science museum there and since we have a big Harry Potter fan under our roof, we decided to make a trip up to see it before it ended.

We brought our good friend, James, with us because he's a big Harry fan too. We had a fantastic weekend. We drove up Friday morning and went straight to the museum. We spent several hours playing there.

We had to get tickets for a particular time, so when our designated time came, we enthusiastically went to the Harry Potter exhibit. The exhibit was mostly costumes and props from the movies. They had movie clips going constantly. But the beginning was the best part. They had a few children come up one at a time to be "sorted" into the proper wizard houses. The boys were ecstatic to be sorted into Gryffindor. James went first and literally did a fist pump and said "YES!"

After we finished the exhibit, we ended in the gift shop. The lights were dim and it was extremely crowded. It goes without saying the boys wanted everything there. And unfortunately everything there was ridiculously priced. We settled on Ron's wand, which was a cheap piece of small plastic, for $8 each. Harry Potter's wand was $50 and the boys were devastated when I dropped the bomb we were not getting one of those for each kid. They had a pack of trading cards that the kids also really wanted for $50 as well.

That evening we went to dinner at Red Mill Burger, featured on Man vs. Food. Yum! We drove to the hotel and spent the rest of the evening playing in the pool and hot tub. After showers that night, Sambo curled up in a ball on a chair and was asleep before we even turned off the lights. James and Buddy wanted to sleep together and begged and begged. We aren't dumb and knew that was a really bad idea. They were still extremely excited about the Harry Potter extravaganza, but we agreed they could sleep together -- with the condition that they would get no warnings if they fooled around. They fell asleep all cuddled together within ten minutes. I really wish I had taken a picture of that sight. Adorable!

The next morning we loaded up on a gigantic breakfast in the hotel. Then we took a long walk down to Pike's. It was a little drizzly and we got to Pike's right when it opened. It was by far the least crowded I've ever seen it. We took the "Hogwarts Express" (the monorail) and happened upon a Chinese New Year celebration. We hung out there for awhile and the kids did a craft. Eventually we walked back to he hotel and headed home.

G and I agreed it was especially fun to take a little weekend that revolved entirely around the kids. I'm not a Harry Potter fan (although I'm considering conversion), so I was really surprised that we could fill two days worth of conversation exclusively talking about the first three books of the series. Even though I'm still suspicious of "wizards" and "dragons" I now want to read the books just because I'm curious how in the world the author could be so clever to captivate millions of people -- from small children (even Sambo is a fan) to adults. It's incredible!

Forever Young the Giant

2011-02-28T21:01:00.000-08:00

Last weekend G and I went to a Young the Giant concert. It was pretty enjoyable, especially since we got tickets for $5 each (and no fees) and we used a Groupon for dinner. So it was a relatively cheap date (besides paying the babysitter, which would be a topic for another time, although this babysitter was actually really good this time.)

The best part of the night, though, was watching a man who hung out next to us the entire time. He was there with his daughter. It was an "all ages" show, so a few people had their tween children with them. But this guy brought his 7-ish-year old daughter to the show. She had earplugs and everything and was clean and adorably dressed in her ruffled denim skirt, colorful striped tights, pink hoodie and ponytail. She was extraordinarily well-behaved. She never left her dad's side. And she complained far less than I did. (Hey, my plantar fasciatis hurts when standing in one place!) The concert was three hours and ended at midnight and she never got even close to cranky.

Apparently fathers come in all shapes and sizes because he was NASTY. He smelled outrageous. Seriously, the worst BO every time he lifted his arms. His shirt said, "The Scourge of America is Upon You." What does that even mean? He had acne worse than any teenager I've ever seen and his hair. Oh mercy, his hair. I know the picture above isn't he best (we had to be sly when sneaking a shot), but notice the long nappy hair hanging down between his arms. It was greasy and frizzy and just foul. Yet, besides taking a small child to a rock concert, and allowing a stranger (a woman) to hold his daughter on her shoulders during the entire Young the Giant performance... he seemed like a fairly attentive father. We followed them out of the concert and they were greeted outside by a woman who was clearly the mother of the girl.

So odd. If I had been more friendly I definitely would have struck up conversation with the little girl. Because I was and still am dying to know their story.

Family Lego Night

2011-02-22T17:53:00.000-08:00

Before very recently I had never put together those fancy lego sets. G grew up a lego fan and even now has probably 10 sets from his childhood tucked away. Turns out I really like building legos too. I have absolutely no creativity, so I'm not any good at making up my own creations, much to the disappointment of my children. But I'm amazingly talented at following the directions. (We all have our talents...) That realization began a new family tradition called "Family Lego Night."

This is how it works: The boys each pick out a lego set and G and I work one-on-one with a boy to build the set. We all sit together in the family room, listen to music, and work on our legos. G and I try to help, but the boys mostly like us to take a supportive role, especially Buddy. Although even Sambo is amazingly good at doing legos. He doesn't know how to follow along the directions (since he doesn't know his numbers), but if I pull a lego brick out of the pile, he can look at the picture and figure out where it goes with surprising little direction. It's as fun as it sounds! We all absolutely love it! Two Family Lego Nights down in the past few weeks -- and we expect plenty more.

Best Valentine's Day Ever (by G)

2011-02-14T23:08:00.000-08:00

Valentine's Day is an interesting holiday. If you're single, then it accentuates the fact that you are single. If you are in a relationship, then there is an obligation to do something or buy something, etc. Normally, I enjoy the holiday and M and I have some traditions that we have made over the years, like getting pizza, strawberries to be dipped in chocolate, and hang out together. This year, however, M kicked it up to a whole new level, so instead of just enjoying the holiday, I think it was the best one ever.

A few weeks ago, M went over to a friend's house who she normally doesn't hang out with. I didn't really think much of it and when I asked her about it, she said that I would find out about it later. The next day, February 1st, I awoke to a valentine. The valentine said that I would be receiving a valentine every day through Valentine's Day. I thought this was really clever. I came to really enjoy getting each valentine and anticipated it throughout the day. All of the valentines were unique in their own way and all were really clever. As it turned out, when M went over to the friend's house, there were 13 other women there and each one did a valentine for a particular day and then they exchanged them. M's, incidentally, was a 2 liter of Crush soda with a note that said, "I have a Crush on you." Saturday night, we had a dinner with most of the couples whose wives participated. It was a lot of fun and the group was definitely hand-selected and included some of our favorite friends.

Tonight I got the last valentine and an additional surprise. M had made a music collage of different pictures of us throughout the years. This probably won't be funny to anyone else, but the first song in the collage was an Aaron Neville and Linda Ronstadt duet of "I Don't Know Much." Needless to say we were dying of laughter. We heard it flipping through the radio stations a few days ago and thought it was funny then and now it's even funnier with our pictures. I'm still laughing.

I am a little disappointed that it's over but one thing I can say is that I have the best wife in the world. The mere fact that she would take the time to express her love for me in so many different ways just makes me love her more and more. I sometimes feel sorry for her that she has to put up with a house full of boys and all of our obnoxiousness, smelly, messy, and crazy behavior. One thing I know without a doubt is that we could not survive without her. M is the best thing to have ever happened to me and I feel extremely fortunate and blessed to have married her. Happy Valentine's Day, Sugar!

Up to No Good

2011-02-14T07:49:00.000-08:00

Buddy lost his first tooth... finally. He had a dentist appointment three weeks ago and he predicted he'd lose it around Valentine's day. And he did! He looks really cute, but I wish he'd stop growing up.

During the sacrament yesterday Buddy leaned over and whispered, "Would it be OK if I pointed my middle finger at Satan?"

I had to give that some serious thought. Eventually I suggested he focus on doing good rather than being mean.

I had a profound insight yesterday. Sambo is super sweet. I don't know how to explain it other than to say everything he does is precious and darling. But sometimes he reveals a side of himself that is so not sweet. His temper tantrums and bad moods swing so far away from sweet, it's actually really amusing. However, no matter how foul his mood, he very rarely rattles me. His personality is the perfect compliment to mine. It occurred to me yesterday that he's like sour patch kid. And in case you didn't know, I adore sour patch kids.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Living Among the Hyper

2011-02-11T09:14:00.000-08:00

Sunday Buddy was bouncing off the walls (typical Sunday behavior) and jumped off the slide in our living room (yes, we have a 4-foot tall slide in our living room). He caught himself with his hands, like usual when doing a fancy trick off the slide. This time he immediately cried out in pain. He normally doesn't cry like that, but he got over it really quickly, so I didn't worry too much. He complained on and off for a couple days that it really hurt, but he was using it and it wasn't swollen. Wednesday night he was bouncing off the walls again, and fell again on the same arm. He cried harder than I've heard him cry in over a year, I'm sure. When I pulled his arm to get him to turn around later that night, it brought tears to his eyes again. I started to worry a little, so I made an appointment for him the next day after school.

Turns out it is fractured. Don't be alarmed, though, it's not that bad. It's a "greenstick fracture" which just means the bone got bent like a green stick, since his bones are still so soft. So rather than cracking, it's just got a little bend or bow like a green stick does if you bend it. He has been gloating about being "right" all along and he's loving having this broken bone. If he's in any pain, he doesn't act like it. He doesn't even have to have a cast because it's best if it just heals naturally. He does have a splint to keep it still and to remind him to be careful.

What's really remarkable is that for the three arm injuries he's had (dislocated/nursemaid's elbow, sprained wrist, now this), none have been too big of a deal. Considering his propensity for climbing trees and his strong desire to jump off the roof, I'm sure this isn't the last time this will happen -- and I probably ought to consider myself fortunate that we've never had anything worse.

The doctor recommended no climbing, jumping, or acting out of control for two weeks. I literally started laughing when he said that. He doesn't know my kids very well.

This video was taken on Buddy's second day of school back in September. Buddy was especially hyper that week between the adjustment of getting up earlier for school and apparently not burning enough energy during the school day. I thought putting a kids yoga DVD on after dinner would help calm the boys enough to go to bed. Apparently I don't know my kids very well either. (This video is a bit long, but i promise you won't be disappointed!)

Urgent Need of Help with Adoption Legislation

2011-02-09T21:50:00.000-08:00

(Click to Enlarge)

Many of you have asked what you can do to support our adoption journey this time around. I have found something you can do!

There are a few anti-adoption bills in the Oregon legislature (as well as other states in the country) right now that obviously concern me. One in particular, HB 2904, is very serious. It would make adoptions very difficult in Oregon. It would require birth parents to wait until the baby is 8 days old to place them for adoption as well as give them 30 days to essentially change their mind.

If you are so inclined, I would love for you to email your Legislator (if you are in Oregon) as well as the chairs of the Human Services committee. If you are not in Oregon, you can still help by emailing the chairs of the Human Services committee. Your email can be short and sweet and say something like:

Dear Representative _________,
     My name is ______ and I am a [friend of adoption] or [concerned citizen] or [adoptive grandparent] in the state of Oregon. I want to voice my opposition to House Bill 2904. I believe that [it takes away a birthparent’s right to make plans for the future of their child and it will have a negative impact on adoption here in Oregon.]

   Thank you for your time.
    Sincerely, __________ address, phone

Feel free to write whatever makes sense to you. I'm also posting the letter I wrote in a separate blog post (scroll down) so you can see why I think this is such a big deal. The picture at the top of this post is Buddy's letter. This is a fairly urgent matter, so the sooner the better!

Thank you so very much!

If you are in Oregon, you can check this website to find your Legislator.

Chairs for Human Services Committee:
Carolyn Tomei

rep.carolyntomei@state.or.us

Vic Gilliam

rep.vicgilliam@state.or.us

The Horrible Sponsors of the bill:

Margaret Doherty

rep.margaretdoherty@state.or.us

Michael Dembrow

rep.michaeldembrow@state.or.us

A blog written by a birth mother with lots of info about the bill.

Dear Representative:

2011-02-09T21:47:00.000-08:00

I am an adoptive mother and am writing you concerning HB 2904. I am strongly opposed to this bill. I adopted two little boys as infants (ages 7 and 3 now). My husband and I are anxious and excited to adopt another baby, and are hopeful that another wonderful birthmother will choose us to the be the parents of her baby. I love my children, as all parents do. But when a woman makes a sacrifice as big as my boys’ birth mothers have — so that I can be a mother — I have the added responsibility to protect and defend that sacrifice. I will do anything to defend my boys’ rights to a safe and stable home. And because I love, honor, and revere, their birth mothers, I will do anything I can to defend their choices to place their babies for adoption.

I am attaching a letter hand-written by my 7-year old son expressing his genuine feelings about adoption so you can understand his perspective as well.

We have open adoptions with both boys’ birth mothers and would not have it any other way. We love sharing all the details about our children’s growth and development. We love hearing how each woman has grown and changed since placing her baby. But we most cherish visits with each woman, when we can get to know them better and talk to them about their hopes and dreams for their babies. I will also attach a recent picture of each of my children with their birth mothers.

This bill makes me fear for my future family (because we hope to adopt again) and makes me grateful this law was not in place when my boys were placed for adoption. This bill would have caused tremendous stress for both birth mothers.

This bill will make it nearly impossible for birth mothers to choose adoption. The 8-day waiting period before placement concerns me.

Who will care for the baby during that time? Foster care? The birth mother? Often if a birth mother is choosing to place a baby for adoption it is because she wants the best life possible for her baby and she is not able to provide that best life. Requiring her to parent (care for a vulnerable baby) during those critical 8 days will be a burden. She will have to have a carseat, clothes, formula, a safe place to live, etc.
The required 8-day waiting period takes away the birth mother’s choice. The beauty of adoption is the loving choice she makes for her baby.

The bill would allow birth parents to revoke their consent during the first 30 days.

Placing a child for adoption is the most heart-wrenching thing a person can do. It always involves grief and heartache. Birth mothers say those first 30 days are unbearable. But time, and for most birth parents, having contact with the adoptive parents through email, heals that deep sorrow. Having the option to “change your mind” is not a good solution to healing that heartache. It encourages birth mothers to “try” adoption, knowing they have the option to change their mind and parent their baby if the healing process is hard. Anyone that has placed a baby will admit that the healing process will be hard. Proper counseling by a skilled adoption caseworker or attorney before and after placement will help. And of course, time helps too.
Revoked and contested adoptions do not have the child’s best interest in mind. It puts the birth family against the adoptive family. It would not be easy for a baby to spend 8 days bonding with his birth mother, spend time bonding with the adoptive parents, then be removed from his home and put back with his birth mother. No matter how a birth mother is grieving, that is not healthy for a child.

The birth mothers who are supporting this Bill placed many years ago (in the 50’s and 60’s) when adoption “culture” was different. The reality of adoption now in Oregon (and the rest of the country) is actually very different from what they are expressing. Open adoption, where birth mothers have open communication with the adoptive family, is the norm now. Babies are never “snatched” out of their arms of the birth mothers. And adopted children grow up happy and well-adjusted, just like children born and raised the more traditional way.

I appreciate your support and your attention to my concerns.

Worst-Good-Better-Best (Updated)

2011-02-02T09:12:00.000-08:00

Worst

Our little friend, Liam (age 6), is getting an MRI today to show how quickly his brain cancer is spreading. This MRI will determine his next treatment plan. He has already had three brain surgeries and one 6-week round of radiation. Those didn't work. Chemo is not a good option, but it might be the only option left. Besides a miracle, of course. And we know miracles do happen. Please pray for him and his remarkable family. His mom has been one of my closest friends for a few years and it's really hard to watch this situation unfold. However, I've never met a family with more faith and hope. I have noticed that tragedies bring out the best or worst of people. This family was good to the core before the cancer, and they have become even better through it. They have shown me what it really means to have hope. You can read about their entire experience on their blog. Don't worry, it's not depressing, it's actually extremely inspiring. You will be so glad you did!

Update: This item should be moved to VERY Best. Liam's MRI came up clean. The third surgery to remove the cancer a few months ago worked. That third surgery was to remove the cancer that grew in the face of radiation. At that point the cancer was termed very aggressive. But it is gone. The surgery got it all. A few months ago Liam's dad said they have come to expect miracles in their family. Go read their blog. Do it!

Good

I went to my weights class for the first time in SIX months yesterday! I had been to that class at least once a week for 4 years before I broke my foot, so it's really exciting to be back. I have been working out the past few months, but nothing kicks me into shape better than that class. I've lost a lot of muscle, but not as much as I expected. And I'm sore today (really sore), but not as much as I expected. I actually wasn't supposed to do that class until my foot felt great and my plantar fasciitis was under control. That was all happening until we went to Seattle this last weekend and my feet have been killing me ever since. For the rest of my well-being I had to get back to that class and I had set February as a goal when I started physical therapy. So I went to the class with my feet taped and made sure to go light on my squats. My feet are sore today. Maybe if I am vigilant about my PT exercises and taping, I will be OK? This whole thing has been so frustrating!

Better

I'm in love with Sambo's speech class. It has done something really remarkable for him. It's helped his speech, obviously. But it's interesting how getting some words has really helped his personality develop as well. Six months ago he couldn't talk in sentences and he was extremely shy. He was the world's easiest child. That's all changed! G and I went to a training yesterday at his little school to learn how to further his progress at home. First of all, when I dropped him off at his class, his teacher made a comment about how "silly" he acts in circle time and how "independent" he is. Then during the training she made several other comments about "Sambo this" and "Sambo that." "When you read books with your children, ask them to 'read' a page of the story. It gives them control and it encourages them to talk to you. Sambo would sure enjoy having that control!" "To encourage your children to talk, pause a lot and let them fill words in. But Sambo doesn't have a problem getting a word in edgewise and sharing his opinion!" She didn't do that with any other kids. Not once. So apparently we have two precocious children who act silly during circle time, are independent, crave control, talk nonstop, are opinionated, and love to blurt things out. Cool.

Speaking of speech... Sambo learned to ask "why." So adorable. And now when I ask him why, he says, "I dunno!" Even cuter. Seriously. I keep asking him questions he doesn't know the answer to, just so he'll say that.

Best

When we were in Seattle this last weekend we saw a man begging for money on the corner by the bus station. His sign said, "Need money for bus home." Buddy was extremely distressed about that man and talked about him for the rest of the night. Then he saw the same man walking (without his sign) near our hotel the next day. Honestly, I didn't even notice the man. But Buddy is extremely compassionate and started to get really anxious about how we could help him. Because clearly he didn't get enough money to get "home" if he was still wandering around the streets of Seattle. We talked about some ways we could help, mostly talking in generalities since at this point we were several blocks away from the man. And I wasn't willing to take Buddy up on any of his solutions (put Buddy in the hatch of our car so the man could ride in our backseat.) I talked to him about how and when we give to others, and how we can avoid the same homeless/money-less fate by saving our money, getting a good education, and staying close with our families so they can help if needed. I told him that we donate fast offerings to help other people who need a little extra help. It's been a few days now and he has mentioned that man every day since. This morning he asked me when fast Sunday is, so he can fast for him.

Buddy's birthmom donated a kidney to her sister yesterday. Her sister has been on dialysis for a couple of years now plus she also lost her hands and legs to sepsis. It's a really tragic story, but all along the way there have been blessings. Now culminating in this sacrifice. Apparently her sister is doing great and the kidney started producing urine even before it was completely implanted. Buddy's birthmom is doing well but in a lot of pain, which is typical for the donor. Have you ever met anyone to give their baby to complete strangers and donate a kidney? Talk about an angel and a hero. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree, now does it...

Have You Heard the News?

2011-01-27T14:04:00.000-08:00

Oprah has a biological half-sister. Her mother placed a baby for adoption when Oprah was nine. Oprah lived with her father in another state, so she didn't know about the baby until a few months ago. I Tivo'd the show earlier this week when Oprah made the big announcement and then finally watched it last night. I was riveted, so I hope you got to see it too. There were some unfortunate aspects of the story. I was really sorry to hear the sadness and pain that came from Patricia's (the half-sister) adoption story. There was no mention of the adopted family, or why she was in foster care for so many years, so I can only assume that the entire situation was not good. I hate hearing adoption stories like that because some people then assume that all adopted children suffer pain. And that is just not true. In this specific case, it sounds like she had some lousy parents, and that happens plenty of times when families are formed the old-fashioned way too.

However, I thought the story was mostly fabulous. I love it when adoption -- specifically open adoption -- gets a national audience. And who better than Oprah to tell an adoption story!

I loved that Patricia said over and over again that finally meeting her biological family made her feel whole. I believe that too and that is precisely why we have deep and meaningful relationships with our boys' birth families. In fact, Sambo's birthmom is coming over tonight. I hope my boys always feel whole. I hope they never have to formulate their own conclusions because they don't have answers to their beginnings. Fear breeds from a lack of knowledge and understanding. And there really is no reason for my sons to have any fear or worry about their adoptions.

And mostly I loved that Oprah encouraged her mother to let go of the guilt of placing a baby for adoption. Placing a baby is not shameful. It's hard. It's excruciating. But it is not bad. If society could stop making birth mothers feel ashamed of placing a baby, we'd have more women make that choice. And the women that do make that choice could have an easier time healing.

On a related note, Oregon and Idaho have several proposed bills that would essentially make it impossible, if not very difficult, for a woman to choose to a place a baby for adoption. Considering I have a boy born in each Oregon and Idaho, these bills concern me. They are supported by birth mothers that had bad experiences and had their babies "taken" from them years ago. Fortunately, those scenarios don't happen any more because they are illegal and unethical. And fortunately open adoption is the trend now, thus eliminating that fear I was talking about before.

I look forward to getting involved to make sure these bills get stopped before moving past committee. If the time comes where we need more support I will call on my friends and family to pitch in to help write letters too. I will keep you posted!

Sisters

2011-01-25T19:34:00.000-08:00

I mentioned that my sister came to visit for Christmas. She was supposed to stay for 11 days or so, then fly home, then fly back across the country again a mere 10 days later for a wedding in Utah, then return home. She considered flying directly from our house to Utah, but no one there had any baby gear. One day it dawned on us that she ought to just stay with us in the meantime -- thus avoiding two cross-country flights with small children. So we changed some flights around and it become a done deal. She got to hang out for a total of three weeks here with us!

I think part of why my week last week was so rough was because we were all a little (a lot) depressed that she had left. I got used to having a "wife" around. It cannot be overstated how great it was to have an extra set of capable hands. My boys enjoyed having Hippo as a playmate. (In Sambo's case, I use the term "enjoyed" loosely.) And I got really used to having that precious baby smile at me every time I walked by.

I loved every single second of having them here, and was so sad to see them leave. My sister is an amazing mother. She has a gift for patience and is highly trained to understand children and people in general. She is a fabulous cook, cleans up after herself, kept me entertained with funny stories and her sharp wit, not to mention her wise outlook on life. She likes to get out and do things with the kids and had a great attitude even though she battled the stomach flu, a cold, fatigue from caring for a brand new baby, insomnia, and parenting alone when her husband had to go home to get back to school. Her husband is an amazing father. He has a connection with their oldest son that I've never ever seen before. He shares in all the parenting responsibilities (including helping plenty with my kids) and never seems to get tired. That guy is a workhorse and cooked, cleaned, ran errands, played with the kids, helped G set up a new speaker system, to name a few things. With all that said, it's no wonder they were such fun and easy house guests.

You know something really ironic? My sister and I couldn't stand each other growing up. It was a very good thing once we no longer lived under the same roof. We were just shy of two years apart and had to share a room, so we never had privacy and had ample opportunity to torment one another. We had nothing in common besides being stubborn -- so everything about each other was annoying. It was a terrible and volatile relationship. One time many years ago I suggested my sister live with me for a few months. This was when G and I were newlyweds and we had a spare bedroom in our tiny apartment. I can't remember why she needed a place to live. Anyway, my mom heard about the proposal and called and told both of us "HELL NO!" Us living under the same roof = very bad idea.

My how things have changed because now I can hardly wait until our next visit. I found myself begging her to move into my house or at least my town or county when they are done with school. Whereas I found sharing a room with her torture growing up, now I think having her across the country is torture.

Funny how we "used" to have nothing in common yet now I agree with everything she says. We still are different, but our husbands have said on more than one occasion that we're very similar. In fact, they have formed a support group for men married to S* girls. (Luckily there are only two girls in my family.) I don't know what happened. Did our punk kids draw us closer? We do have a lot in common in that department, I'll tell you that. Our oldest children were most definitely cut from the same cloth! Did our shared experiences growing up draw us closer now that we've got adult perspectives? Or like our husbands have been insisting for years, are we more similar that we thought?

Who knows, but I do know this. I miss her like crazy. I miss her kids like crazy. I love them like my own children, and I can't wait for our next visit. Come back soon!

P.S. I only took ONE picture of my sister while she was here. And I never got one of her awesome new hairdo.

P.P.S. I'm still in a good mood after my break last week!

P.P.P.S. Sambo is back. His bad mood/violent tantrums stopped when he got some quantity time with daddy. He's been sweet and adorable just like he used to be. Love this version of him!

Mommy Snapped

2011-01-23T22:28:00.000-08:00

I bet that title got your attention!

Well, it's true.

Mommy snapped last week.

That little child pictured above -- in his mis-matched outfit, pants on backwards, shirt on backwards, (his underwear are on backwards too), trying to put his brother's tie on -- has been making me crazy. He chose that outfit because he does what he wants. And come hell or high-water, there is no convincing him that an outfit like that won't work. Or that ANY of his ideas won't work.

When he turned three he turned from a perfect angel to the devil. Three years old was Buddy's hardest year too, but oh wow, the contrast between 2 months ago and now. Joy vs. Sorrow.

The peace before. The screaming incessantly now. The mellow, go-with-the-flow attitude. The "ME DO IT!" attitude now. The "I don't care if people play with my toys" before. The "MINE!" now. The sitting still before. The curious and into everything now. It's been quite the fun past few weeks. My ears are ringing constantly and I can not get rid of this headache.

And then you add my oldest son who is hyper and doesn't stop talking. And a husband who is never, ever home because he works every night and every weekend. And the holidays/birthdays which wore me out. And a case of the stomach flu (for me) last weekend. And a horrible case of insomnia that came upon me this week. I've only had insomnia one other time in my life and that was many years ago. Why this is happening right now when I could REALLY use some rest is beyond me.

Yep-mommy was worn to a frazzle last week.

(I know, woah is me. My life is so hard.)

I knew I needed a break. Like a long break or I was going to do something I regretted. I was already picking up a pretty serious swearing problem. (Buddy asked G in privacy Friday if I was going to get into heaven since I swear so much.) Plus I knew that my boys were acting up in part because they don't see their father enough.

So I made a phone call to G at work on Thursday that went something like this.

"Hi. I'm really sorry your day is busy. But my day is horrific. I'm exhausted because I haven't slept in over a week. Buddy is sick with a fever and was up all night with insomnia too. Sambo won't stop screaming. Hear him in the background? That's because I wouldn't let him wipe his own bum. Oh, and just to let you know, I'm clocking out tonight at bedtime and I will not be back on duty until Saturday morning. So either you take the day off work tomorrow, or you are going to need to hire a nanny and she needs to be here at 7am to get the kids up tomorrow. What's that? You have a project due tomorrow. Oh that's really too bad. I'll send you a list of nanny options then. Don't call any of my friends because they are stressed out too."

Two hours later I sent him an instant message and asked how the plans were coming.

And this my friends, I why I married this man. He got it all worked out.

I got the entire day off on Friday and I'm guessing I'll be in a good mood as a result for at least a month. It was marvelous. (It actually would have been even better -- if that's possible -- if I wasn't so $%#$ exhausted from my insomnia and if my headache from the screaming children hadn't lingered so long.) I'm sort of thinking of doing this every six months.

Here's what I did.

Slept in until 10:15.
Went furniture shopping.
Went to the gym.
Showered at the gym in peace without little hands touching my make-up and dumping dishwasher soap all over the kitchen while I was in the shower.
Took myself to lunch.
Went shopping at several stores. Picked out some new silverware that G's parents said they would buy for us LAST Christmas, but I haven't had time to pick out with children in tow.
Went to the mall.
Sat down at the mall and watched people. Didn't talk to anyone or listen to anyone.
Continued shopping at the mall.
Got myself a light dinner.
Went to a meeting at LDSFS.
Came home at 9:30 to sleeping children and a clean house. And an exhausted husband.

I love leaving G with the children for so many reasons. I love getting a break, I love returning refreshed and more excited to be with my kids, I love that G gets to hear what I mean when I say our two children are the loudest two children ever to be born, I love that I can always count on G cleaning the house and leaving it immaculate, I love that I can count on G to do housework I've been putting off, like cleaning Sambo's warzone of a bedroom, I love that the kids don't attention-seek and act up as much because they are enjoying time with their father, I love hearing all the hilarious stories from G's day with the kids, I love hearing that he broke the unpardonable sin and peeled Sambo's banana, and I love remembering how lucky I am to be married to someone who takes SOS calls at work seriously.

Christmas in Review

2011-01-19T16:43:00.000-08:00

Is it too late to be talking about Christmas? Hopefully not because I have a lot to say. I've been too hung over in post-holiday bliss to get around to cracking open Blogger to give you an adequate recap. But here goes now.

We had a marvelous Christmas. Probably our best -- for a few reasons. First of all, Sambo is plenty old enough now to "get it" and anticipated the big day right along with the rest of us. We've been working on trying to get him to say his own prayers for a good year and finally, finally... he uttered his first prayer without us prompting him. And you'll never guess what he prayed for: that Santa Claus would bring him presents. Beggers can't be choosers, and we were elated that he finally prayed all by himself. (Even if we are a little worried he'll be a jack Mormon.)

So anyway, celebrating the holiday with the boys was great. Christmas morning surrounded by kids is about as good as life gets, in my opinion. Plus, my sister and her family came to visit. They arrived the evening of my birthday. She has a newborn, so besides getting "peace and quiet" and lunch out with my best friends for my birthday, I also got to see my awesome nephew, Henry and hold his new brother, Finn. Made for a perfect birthday!

Christmas Eve 2010. The boys wearing their new jammies.

Christmas morning was great. Santa did come and bring lots of presents. Including an amazing slide he found on craigslist. Santa is just soooo smart!

We hosted Christmas dinner, which was fun and crazy. We had 25 people plus two babies. Hosting made for a very long day, and I think we ought to definitely consider simplifying in the the future... but it was great having so much family here at our house. And the food wasn't too shabby either. This family can cook!

I got a new camera for Christmas, so the quality of my photos will hopefully be better from now on. That is, if I ever learn how to use it. Here's my first attempt Christmas night:

And I apologize now for all the jealousy my darling children cause you when you read my blog. Yes, I am aware they are STUNNING. And now I have a good camera to prove it.

The rest of our Christmas vacation was fabulous too. We had an extremely fun New Year's party with friends and my siblings and cousin. Then the next day my sister woke up with a horrible case of the stomach flu and since then it's knocked most of the adults out, one at a time. But that didn't stop the fun.

6 of the 8 darlings at our New Year's Party

Greg got a little carried away ringing in the New Year.

My sister was supposed to leave to return home to Detroit the Monday after New Year's. She was supposed to fly home, then fly back across the country to Utah a week and a half later for a wedding. Rather than torture herself with several cross-country flights with restless little ones, we thought she should stay and torture herself at our house until the wedding. And so she did! And having her here was the cherry on top of an already great Christmas. (More on that in another post.)

One of the best parts of having everybody around during Christmas was having all the cousins together. Even if Sambo and cousin Henry COULD NOT get along for more than 3 seconds at a time (no exaggeration), and even if we spent the entire time trying to keep the two of them apart, it was still really fun having all five cousins together (all boys!).

Buddy loves the babies!

Baby Camden (11 months) was completely smitten by Baby Finn (9 weeks) -- and the other way around. Finn would laugh hysterically watching his slightly older cousin.

Buddy played so cute with Finn. He would spend 20 minutes stimulating him, then Finn would need a monster nap. (I feel the same way, Finn!)

Movie time. An attempt to calm the masses.

Playing at the Children's Museum. A rare moment of peace between these two.

Yes, it's confirmed. I want one of these SOON.

All five cousins before bed.

The Lady of the House is Another Year Older (by G)

2010-12-24T08:51:00.000-08:00

Today is M's 34th Birthday even though she doesn't look it. I think I have a harder time waiting for it than she does. She usually doesn't like surprises unless it's presents, so I try to keep her guessing even though I have a hard time keeping it to myself. This year I told the boys that she wants two things for her birthday. The first is peace and the second is quiet. We'll do our best.

Her talents are:

- Hardworking
-Responsible
-Funny
-Great cook
-Smart
-Good friend
-Travel agent
-Pretty
-Organized
-Involved
-Kind, compassionate, and service oriented
-Teacher
-Religious

She likes:

-Reading
-Cooking and eating
-Going to the gym
-Hanging out with friends
-Traveling
-Crafts
-Music
-Shopping
-Me and the boys
-Adoption
-News
-Holidays

She dislikes:

-Messes
-Drama
-Broken bones
-Annoyance
-Germs
-Boogers
-Mass chaos

If You Ever Surprise Me Again, Do This

2010-12-21T23:06:00.000-08:00

...That's what Buddy told me in line on one of the waterslides at the Great Wolf Lodge when we were there a few weekends ago.

We found out about a huge discount, so we and our good friends jumped on the opportunity to go. We surprised the kids on Sambo's birthday. They had no idea where we were going until we pulled into the parking lot. And it did not disappoint! I had heard so many people tell me how great it was, but honestly, I actually think the experience exceeded my expectations. The best part was that the hotel, restaurants, and water park are made for kids, so we never had to tell the kids "calm down," "be quiet," "stop jumping/climbing/making a mess." The kids could be kids for a change!

Sambo and his best friend, Connor

Buddy loves to swim, so he was in heaven, the entire time. He has no fear, so he was really disappointed that he wasn't tall enough for the biggest slide. He definitely didn't inherit his fearlessness from me! Sambo also had a lot of fun and was pretty fearless too. We swam for a few hours the first day we were there, and most of the day the second day.

The hotel had plenty of other activities for the kids. They had a story time in the evening. All the kids came in their pajamas and then giant ceiling fans blew bubbles around the hotel lobby, to make it look like it was snowing!

That evening was also Sambo's birthday, so we had a small party in our room and the kids hung out and watched some cartoons.

The only thing that would have made it better was if Shauna, Jesse, and their kids were there! (Next time!?) Can't wait to do it again!

Trimming the Tree

2010-12-18T22:06:00.000-08:00

We got a gorgeous tree this year. Buddy and G braved the tree farm in heavy rains and Buddy picked it out. They did a most excellent job choosing! The boys, particularly Buddy, love decorating for holidays. Buddy is very particular about how things get decorated, and I hate the act of decorating, so I let them take control of the tree. They put things where they want, and while there are some sparse places (especially at the top), it looks great! I love fresh trees and I love my kids, and I love listening to Christmas music, and I love all the handmade and other meaningful ornaments, so it was quite a joyful time watching them work.

In case you are curious, G got sweaty bringing our tree in, so he took his shirt off to cool off. Next thing you know, the boys had their shirts off too. (I kept mine on.)

As a sidenote, a few weeks ago, when we were still decorating for Halloween, Buddy asked me if when he moves out if he can take the Halloween and Christmas decorations with him. I still feel sick to my stomach that he is already thinking about moving out (however, I was about his age when I started making plans, so it makes sense). But still, it illustrates how much he loves decorating for the holidays.

Status Updates

2010-12-17T12:49:00.000-08:00

If I had facebook, my status update for today would be:

Tired (really tired) of getting up and doing the school routine. Yay! School's out for 17 days!

--OR--

What did moms do before Clorox wipes were invented? Especially with boys who pee on the floor/wall every day, smear poop on the toilet seat, and splatter bloody noses all over the bathroom at 5am? Clorox, I love you!

--OR--

Dopamine levels are right where they should be. Got my laptop back today from being repaired.

Believing in Santa

2010-12-14T23:16:00.000-08:00

Sam actually was excited this year to sit on Santa's lap too. Three is the magical age when Santa becomes your friend!

We've thought for a few years now that Buddy would learn the truth about Santa young. He's always seemed suspicious and has always asked a lot of questions about the jolly guy. The best was a few years ago when he saw the items in his stocking and said, "Looks like Santa Claus shops at the Dollar Tree and Fred Meyer!" He was 3 years old at the time.

So it surprises us that at age of 7 he believes more than ever. Although just tonight he asked if Santa is really real... We've determined that all his questions have been to reassure himself that Santa is real and to paint a more elaborate story in his mind of the magic of Christmas. With all this magic he's created, we think it'll be a good long time before he believes anything different. We love it that way!

The boys waiting for the rest of the kids to sit on Santa's lap so they could get their presents.

Case in point: Last week was G's work Christmas party. Every year Santa makes an appearance -- and brings gifts. And this year Buddy was on pins and needles, asking every 30 seconds how many more minutes until he arrived. Buddy was at a craft station adding glitter to a paper snowflake when he first heard the tinkling of Santa's bell as he came down the hall to the party. As soon as he heard the bell, Buddy dropped his glitter and literally RAN to Santa. He ended up the second child (of probably 50) in line to sit on Santa's lap. It was so classic Buddy and I was so glad to be standing right there to witness his innocence and his enthusiasm.

Hopefully he never stops believing.

My Other Big Boy is 36!

2010-12-13T14:30:00.000-08:00

Little G is officially in his "late 30's." Speaking of growing up so fast! It seems crazy to think we've been friends for 14 years. He honestly has hardly changed: besides a few pounds, gray hairs, two degrees, and two kids. He's almost exactly like he was when I first met him. Let's see... I wonder if he'll still be listening to pop and/or punk music at 50?! I wonder if he'll still be madly in love with ribs and snowboarding, loud concerts, and collecting friends? Here's to lots more birthdays together! Happy Birthday to my favorite person!

To keep with tradition this year:

Here are his talents:

Hardworker
Loyal
Great sense of humor
Amazing and involved father
Responsible
Easy to get along with. I've decided that if you can't get along with him, it's your problem. (I have to remind myself of that at times...)
Quick to forgive
Making brownies (I proved last night this is NOT one of my talents.)
Making clients happy
Playing with the kids
Back scratches
Patience

His Likes:

Skiing and snowboarding
Downloading and listening to music
Going to concerts
Going out to dinner
Ribs
Hamburgers
Sleeping in
Going on vacation
Our boys
Me
Reading
Movies
Shopping

His Dislikes:

Hanging Christmas lights (but he does it anyway)
Getting up early
Meetings
Squash
Cooking (although he's pretty good at it)
Dishes (but he does them almost every night)
Poop

Growing Old Gracefully

2010-12-12T20:54:00.000-08:00

A couple weeks ago Buddy was sitting next to me on the couch. He looked over at me, pointed to my hair, and said, "Did you know they make hair dye for those?"
(True, I'm getting some grays. But I told him I've been too busy planning birthday parties and Christmas to make a hair appointment.)

Earlier this week Buddy informed me my tummy is getting fatter.
(It's true.)

And then a few days later he told me I look like a teenager, but I'm getting old.
(That's true too.)

Love Days Like This

2010-12-11T22:36:00.000-08:00

Last week Nicki, Christy and I made applesauce for the first time. I absolutely love canning and I love apples, so it sounded like a recipe for a great afternoon. We spent the entire day canning 100 pounds of aurora apples. I grossly underestimated how fabulous the applesauce would taste. It turned out so great! And the best part? A full day of fun conversation with wonderful friends. We can hardly wait until next summer so we can fire up the gas burners and can something else!

This (Little*) Big Boy Turned THREE!

2010-12-10T19:48:00.000-08:00

*We are no longer allowed to call him a "little" boy.

I hate it when my boys turn three. Three is so grown up! By age three, they think they can do anything "ALL MYSELF!" Despite turning three, I have still been calling Sambo my baby, and pretending he's a baby, but he hates it. And that makes the whole growing up thing even worse...

However, Sambo is just about as perfect as they come. He's been easy from day one and athough in the past few weeks he's been testing limits and thinking he's old enough to do whatever he wants, he's still the easiest three-year old I've ever had, if you know what I mean.

He still follows Buddy around constantly but is starting to become more independent, which is both good and sad. He idolizes his brother and probably always will.

Here are his talents:

Being cute. He is just so incredibly cute, sometimes we can't stand it. He is just cute through and through.
Riding a scooter. He can ride his razor scooter like nobody's business. And if the weather was still warm, I'm convinced he would have learned to ride his bike without training wheels. He is very coordinated and has excellent balance. He was re-tested when he graduated from 'early intervention' and he scored 100% on gross and fine motor skills. Meaning 0% of 3-year olds have his mad motor skills. (To compare, he scored 4% on speech articulation, meaning 96% of 3-year olds pronounce words better than he does.)
Coloring. He loves to color and draw. His only problem is his pathetic teacher/mother is CLUELESS about arts and crafts. It's a horrible shame, actually.
Being a good boy. He doesn't throw tantrums and generally listens and obeys really well. He follows directions and wants to please everyone.
Being happy. He is super easy to please and finds joy in the simple things in life.
Cuddling.
Loving deeply. He loves, and I mean LOVES his family and friends.

His Likes:

Legos
Candy
His Brother
Connor
Dogs and cats. (He requested a "cat" birthday party, which I thought was pretty funny.)
Playing outside
Riding his bike and scooter
Coloring
Watching movies with Buddy
Playing games
Helping
Doing whatever his brother is doing
Eating snacks
His new speech class
Sports
Cars and trucks
Pizza

His Dislikes:

Being treated like a baby
Applesauce
Taking naps
Being fed, dressed, or put in his carseat

Took My Breath Away

2010-11-30T13:22:00.000-08:00

My normal radio stations were making my headache worse this morning, so I flipped over to the country station. The song caught my attention, so I listened to the whole thing. A google search just now taught me that it's called "Take Your Breath Away" by George Strait.

I've heard the quote, "Life isn't measured by the breaths you take but by the things that take your breath away," but I've never given it much thought.

Although corny, the song reminded me of that quote, and really made me think. The thought came to me that we often remember our lives as a series of events. But it's the way those events affect us that makes us who we are. So when I heard the song this morning I determined to start taking notice of things in my boring old life that do take my breath away. I'll write some of them here, as a way to be grateful for some of the simple and awesome things that happen all the time. But otherwise would go unrecognized or even forgotten. I encourage you to do the same on your blog or the comments here.

To start, yesterday: I was volunteering in Buddy's class at school while a professional artist gave the kids a lesson in drawing and the techniques of painting with watercolors. The artist showed the kids some slides of art and colors and asked them all sorts of questions to get their creative juices flowing. There is one boy in Buddy's class that is, in my opinion, a little socially awkward. He lives down the road from us, so Buddy made friends with him on the bus and now they sit together on the bus, eat lunch together, and he's been to our house a few times. He's not an outcast or anything, but not the typical outgoing person that Buddy is normally attracted to, yet for whatever reason (and I've asked myself 100 times why), he has became one of Buddy's closest friends this year. Anyway, that boy raised his hand and answered one of the artists questions. Immediately, I noticed Buddy try to make eye contact with the friend from across the room. Then... I saw Buddy give him a thumbs up. I hope to never forgot what it means to be a good friend.

Today: Sambo started a speech class at the early special education offices. He got all ready for "school," put his backpack on, and told me all the way over to the school that he didn't want me to go in with him. He wanted me to leave him there so he could be a big boy -- and I did. He was so cute I could hardly stand it. And although he won't be three years old until Sunday, he grew up today.

Today: I was reading a blog post today from one of my favorite bloggers. She was writing about disciplining her 6-year old triplets and mentioned a comment she received on her blog four years ago, when her triplets were two. "Shame on you for not possessing the same control you expect of your children." This comment didn't just take my breath away, but sucked all my air right out of my body. I am going to use this comment as a guidepost for my parenting.

Monster Bash

2010-11-26T22:23:00.000-08:00

Buddy is really into monsters, and absolutely loves all things Halloween, so we hosted eight of Buddy's monster-friends for his 7th birthday party.

We started with a monster craft.

Then we played freeze dance to some "spooky" music. Freeze dance quickly turned into a 10-kid dog pile.

Then we had the kids put their hand in bowls of "blood and guts," "monster fingernails," "scabs," "eyeballs," "intestines," and "monster fingers." It was hysterical how some of the boys were so afraid they would hardly participate. A few boys thought the activity was dumb and then there were a few (like Buddy) who are so imaginative that they really hoped that those were really were monster fingers.

Next, the boys wrapped each other with toilet paper like mummies. We were so impressed with how well the boys did at this activity. And how much they loved it!

We finished the party with monster cupcakes and presents.

That evening we went to Famous Daves so Buddy could get himself some ribs (his favorite), and we ended at Sonic for slushes. Then on Sunday we had a family party with Buddy's second favorite: whole-wheat waffles with strawberries, chocolate chips and syrup along with blueberry muffins and eggs, and then caramel apples for dessert. We had a great weekend. We are so happy Buddy gave us a reason to celebrate -- and eat excellent food!

Lucky Number Seven!

2010-11-23T14:15:00.000-08:00

Buddy turned 7 on Sunday! I will post later about the weekend's festivities, but first I wanted to highlight what an amazing boy he is.

His likes:

Playing outside
Playing with friends
Reading
Going to school
Harry Potter
Monsters
Animals and birds
Going out to dinner
Swimming
Rocks and minerals
Getting presents
His family

His Dislikes:

Tomatoes
Satan
Going to bed
Public speaking
Contention or competition

(I asked him his likes and dislikes and a few of the above answers are from his own comments. Can you decide which are from him and which are from me?)

His Talents:

He is a peacemaker. He can't stand contention and never picks fights, fights back, or reacts in anger.
He can sure argue, though. He generally thinks he's right and his way is best. He is very articulate and uses that to his advantage. The longer we spend with him the more we realize, more often than not, he is right. It's infuriating, actually.
He treats his brother like gold. I have hardly met anyone as patient as he is. I keep waiting for the day when he gets tired of giving in, sharing, having his stuff ruined, or being copied -- but I doubt the day will come. He sincerely likes having Sambo around.
He is so smart, it's starting to worry me. He's on the verge of being smarter than me and that is NOT good. He loves science and loves to read. Math at school is really fun, so he's starting to like that a lot too. He's not very creative in his writing yet at school, but he's working on it and in all the practicing he's been doing, he's developing excellent spelling and punctuation.
He is friendly and loves his friends. He makes new friends wherever he goes, particularly with boys his age, boys older than him, and babies.
He is confident in his faith. And speaking of faith, his faith is enormous. He wrote a book at school about the things he is most thankful for. To summarize, he's thankful for his parents, his brother, himself because he's a "son of God" and for God himself. He has started reading the Book of Mormon and his insights make me think for days. G and I have had our best gospel discussions from our entire marriage in the last few weeks discussing the things he's brought up.
He can talk people into just about anything. He comes home from school with trinkets and presents from different people every day. And he's been known to come home from a neighbor's house with new (to him) shoes, toys, candy, ice cream, you name it. There's been a steady stream of neighborhood kids in our backyard for the past six months putting slugs/frogs/snakes/salamanders/mole carcasses in his animal cages. Everyone knows that if they find a cool bug or animal (or set of bones) they should come put them in our backyard. (Much to my dismay.)
He is still full of energy and life. He runs everywhere and climbs on everything. He makes messes wherever he goes.
He is funny and clever.
He is a hardworker.
He is a great leader and a good example.
He is spontaneous. This is often a problem at school or when it's time to calm down and focus, but it's a huge part of his personality. Therefore, we're trying to find a good reason for this "talent."
He loves and respects nature.
He has developed a very tender and cuddly part of his personality. He was not cuddly as a baby or toddler, so we have loved this new development.

G and I love him so very much. We asked each other last night if there is a more loved child on this earth. It's really interesting because he struggles to realize just how many people love him. It's so frustrating considering the huge amount of love me, G, and Sambo have for him, our extended family, his birth family, Sambo's birth family, and his huge circle of friends. He is loved, that's for sure.

A Few Weird Things

2010-11-15T21:45:00.000-08:00

Today was exhausting. Not bad in any way, but I'm bone tired. And the rest of the week isn't looking any less tiring.

Here's a few weird things that have been happening around here lately.

Both boys have birthdays withing the next few days. Sambo (the littler one) thinks he's turning 7 because Buddy is. I'm sure this is normal with a younger sibling, but I think it's hilarious. He had to have a speech evaluation the other day and one of the questions was to see if he knew his age. He said he was 7 and will not be convinced otherwise.

Buddy added "baby sister" to his Christmas list. We've talked about adopting in generalizations because the last thing he needs is more pressure in his life. Plus he has no concept of time and the wait will be long. However, when he added a sister to his list, I talked to him a little more about it so he's clear that we are actively hoping to adopt. I feel better that he knows and I don't have to talk in generalizations any more. I hope his faith helps it happen. I'm sure it will.

Everyone in this family is bossy beyond belief. Either this is a requirement for being one of us, or it's learned. I can't decide which is most true. Anyway, we babysat a 1-year old baby the other night and my boys both thought they were in charge of the baby. Sambo kept telling her to "be quiet." And when she cried, Buddy spent the entire time trying to get her to stop. It was equally cute and disturbing.

After babysitting the baby I asked my boys if they are ready for a baby sister. Sambo said "yes." Buddy sighed and said, "No. It's going to be so much work and I already have so many things to do." I found that incredibly funny. (Refer previous comment about bossiness.)

Today Buddy was looking through some toy ads, circling what he wants for Christmas (although I'm almost done shopping). He informed me he was circling some DS games. He doesn't have a DS and isn't getting a DS, so I thought that was pretty interesting. He also informed me he was circling a few games that are for older kids, "But who cares. Nobody pays attention to those labels anyway." !!!!!! Who taught him about game ratings? He doesn't play video games, so how would he know anything about them? And if he's talking to his friends enough about video games to learn about the rating system, why is he not more interested in playing them? It's all good. I'm glad he doesn't play them.

I wanted to go to the gym tonight and planned to meet G there at 5:30. That's like the worst possible time of day to be driving around town, so I left super early -- which involved hurrying like a crazy woman all afternoon to get to the three stores I needed to go to, put away groceries, get homework done, and make dinner. While I was changing into my gym clothes, I put Buddy in charge of making sure Sambo got his shoes on, coat on, and got buckled in the car. When I got downstairs, I was overjoyed to see the boys both sitting in the car, all buckled in, and waiting patiently. So off we went. We rolled into the parking lot just in time to meet G. However, when I got out of the car, I realized Sambo wasn't wearing any shoes. Back home we went, arriving 50 minutes after we left. No workout done. And a colossal waste of time. I was mildly annoyed with Buddy for forgetting Sambo's shoes, until I remembered that he's not quite 7 years old, and although he thinks he's in charge, he's not. I am, and I need to remember to check things like that before we leave the house. Note to self.

We've been in denial about Sambo growing up and turning 3 in a few weeks. Like major denial. We still call him our baby and assume he's clueless and helpless (which he's not). I realized last week that I've been putting him in shoes two sizes too small and he actually fits better in size 3T clothes, rather than the 2T outfits I've been dressing him in. When did he get so big?????!!!!!! This is so sad. I hate it when my kids grow up and I'm taking him turning 3 really, really hard.

G took Buddy into a dressing room with him last week to try on a shirt. Buddy told him he liked the shirt, if he was trying to dress up like a cub scout leader.

Buddy hasn't lost any teeth and doesn't even have any even close to being loose. As of his last dentist appointment in July, he's not even close. He's really sad about this news, but we are so thrilled! He's so cute with his baby teeth (and remember? we're in denial about our kids growing up). He is, however, finally sprouting two of his 6-year molars, just in time to turn 7 this week. He says he can't feel anything, but they are really swollen and red.

Buddy's fingernails were getting long so last night G started teasing him that maybe we should paint them like a girl. Buddy had no problem with that, and suggested we paint them black, like Ethan in his school class. (Ethan was a ninja for Halloween and painted his nails black.) I'm not sure what disturbed me more. The fact that Buddy was willing to paint his nails, the fact that Buddy wanted to paint them black, or the "since when do we follow every whim and trend" lecture that came out of G's mouth.

Sambo and Buddy can finally carry on a conversation and we are so happy on so many levels. We've only been waiting for 6-7 loooong years for this day to come. Buddy has had diarrhea of the mouth since he was a year old and he's been in desperate need of someone to talk to other than me.

Have I mentioned I have never EVER clipped my kids' nails? I have no interest, so I just don't. Now that Shauna has moved, I'm not sure how G is going to keep up on that task. Oh wait, he's not keeping up.

Sambo has been potty-trained for a couple months now. It was brutal getting him motivated, but once we figured out his "currency," we haven't looked back. He's been a pro and has had very few accidents, and hasn't had any for about six weeks. Does that mean we're out of the woods? He's mostly dry at night and takes himself when he has to go. It's been amazing. So what was his "currency?" Well, currency! I had tried literally everything to motivate him and one day he said he wanted money. So, that's what I gave him. He'd get "money" (a penny) for pee and "big money" (a nickel, dime, or quarter) for poop. That's all it took.

We saw a group of three little girls, approximately Buddy's age at Burger King the other day. I asked him which one was prettiest (does that make me an awful parent???) because I'm curious about his taste and I'm curious at what age boys can tell a truly "pretty" girl. One of the girls fit the "pretty and feminine girl" mold with long blond hair, a sparkly headband, and a ruffly shirt. She was very cute, I have to admit. Sure enough, he got super embarrassed concerning that girl and was un-phased by the other two. I found the entire conversation fascinating.

Every time G goes to Costco, he forgets to get half the list. I'm not criticizing, I'm just making an observation. (I haven't forgotten I'm the one that took Sambo to the gym without shoes...) It's the craziest thing. I think he gets distracted by the samples. I guess I should be glad he happily goes to Costco. Wait! Typing this out just gave me some new insight. All of a sudden I just realized that he enjoys shopping so much at Costco he purposely forgets half the list, so he can go back a few days later. Do you think?

That was AWESOME

2010-11-14T16:24:00.000-08:00

To answer your question, YES, I do plan to blog every time I go to a Brandon Flowers/Killers concert.

We went to our third last night and when it ended I was seriously sad. It was SOOOOO good. Before it started I had to make my peace with the fact that Brandon Flowers is solo at the moment and we wouldn't be watching a Killers concert. I knew the show would be good, but nothing can compare with the type of show the Killers put on. Brandon is such a showman and together with the band and the lights and the keyboard... it's all really exciting. I had to come to grips with the fact that this was smaller and it wouldn't be as showy. Luckily, he did do "Mr. Brightside" during the encore, which was excellent. The rest of the show was so good too, although not quite as good as the last we went to.

A few other observations. Brandon always wears the goofiest outfits. He had his feathered jacket last tour. We watched him on Jimmy Kimmel to promote his solo album and he wore the strangest 90's tapered pants and a Navajo vest. We were hoping he'd wear that because it was so odd/cool. But, he opted for suspenders and high-waisted tapered jeans last night. It's definitely been awhile since I've seen anyone in their 20's wear suspenders.

G really likes the venue we went to last night and I have to agree. We had to sit upstairs in the bar, so I could sit (with my bum foot and all). I had a perfect view of the stage, although G's seat wasn't as good as mine. To be completley honest, I'm too old and too lame to enjoy being in the middle of the chaos on the floor, though, so my bum foot really actually came in handy. G LOVES to be in the middle of the chaos. (This is one of the few differences in personality/interests we have. That and his love of snow sports.)

Anyway, I noticed that we were the youngest folks in the seating area. And we aren't exactly young. I didn't realize that Brandon Flowers draws such an old fan base. There were a lot of people in the 40's and even 50's around us. I'm sure the young whippersnappers were down on the floor, but sheesh, it's not like this was an Elton John concert.

Oh, and the other thing that was really odd was how many people were there stag. The lady sitting next to me was alone. And the guy in front of me was alone. And then there were two people across from us alone. I thought it would be cool to hook them all up, but they all seemed totally fine being alone. So we left them that way. Who goes to concerts alone????? Apparenlty quite a few people.

We love that all restaurants/bars/concert venues are smoke-free in Portland. SO NICE.

So, until next time.

Reason #8762 Why We Love Open Adoptions

2010-11-12T22:41:00.000-08:00

I suggested Buddy write a thank-you note to his birthmom for some gifts she gave him for his upcoming birthday. This is what he came up with 100% on his own. I love this. But I can guarantee that this will make her day/life.

Front cover of the card. She didn't really give him "diamonds" but her husband, Dan, gave him some big plastic jewels that are admittedly AWESOME. Purchased from a gas station, of all places.

Back cover of the card.

Inside the card.
(click to enlarge)

National Adoption Month

2010-11-09T08:56:00.000-08:00

It's National Adoption Month! To celebrate, G and I went to Seattle to an adoption conference this past weekend. I might write more on that later because it was excellent!

We also finally made story books with pictures to tell our boys their adoption stories. They turned out fantastic and each boy will get theirs for their birthdays coming up in a few weeks. Buddy especially will love his. He is very interested in his birth and adoption story and loves looking at old pictures, so he'll really appreciate it. We can hardly wait to give it to him.

I just read my sister's second baby's birth story this morning, which was really cool and well-written, by the way. But anyway, she had a phrase in there I'd never heard before and describes infertility and the adoption process better than I've ever heard before. Pretty amazing considering all the reading and discussing and thinking I've done on the topic. And to think what I feel was summed up by a woman who just gave birth. Now if that's not ironic.

"I felt empty, physically. I felt full, emotionally."

That's what it feels like to go through the adoption process. The process is so incredibly frustrating and hard. Adoption doesn't cure infertility, although counselors suggest you make some peace with it before you start the adoption process. But with all the ups and downs of the adoption process, infertility still manages to rear it's ugly head it seems on a regular basis. Although we're in the valley of this third adoption process -- with nothing good happening -- I am so thankful for this gift. I love being part of the adoption community. I love having deep friendships with birth families. I love getting to know women with unplanned pregnancies. I love talking with adoptive families and adoptees.

But mostly I love my boys and the idea of a third little one coming to our family someday.

Where so much has been taken away, I've been given way more. And that makes me feel full, emotionally.

My adoption network + my boys + the hope of a third child - pregnancy = a very full heart.

Road Trip (by G)

2010-11-07T18:44:00.000-08:00

When I was a freshman at BYU, I met Marc in the dorms, who became one of my best friends. Music, among other things, brought us together. I introduced him to bands like Pavement and he introduced me to other bands including the Pixies. We would hang out all the time and go to shows and other activities. We even married girls who were roommates.

Fast-forward 17 years. We've both graduated with graduated degrees, have kids, work in professional fields and are older and slower than we'd care to admit. Just before Father's Day, Marc's wife, Whitney, contacted me and asked if I would be interested in seeing the Pixies with Marc in Las Vegas. I thought it was one of the greatest ideas I'd ever heard and begged M to let me go. After M agreed, plane tickets and concert tickets were purchased, a hotel was booked, and plans were made for a road trip.

On September 24th, I flew into Salt Lake City and at 9:00am the next morning, Marc picked me up and we were on our way to Las Vegas. We had a lot of catching up to do. We stopped and had chicken fried steak at a little cafe in Beaver, UT on the way. We rolled in to Vegas in the afternoon, checked into the hotel and then took the shuttle to the strip. After walking around for a while and taking in the sights we had dinner at BLT Burger in the Mirage. BLT Burger is only in a few locations. When M and I were in NYC, we had to decide between BLT Burger and Stand and we chose Stand, so naturally I was really excited to eat at BLT Burger. The food was excellent and I even had a twinkie milkshake for desert (it sounds kinda gross, but it was awesome). After we went back to the hotel, changed, and headed over to the Hard Rock Hotel for the show.

The opening band was pretty lame, but when the Pixies went on, they rocked it. We were in the back for the beginning, but once the the Pixies went on, we had to move to the front. We were probably 5 rows from the front of the stage, so we had a really good view. The show totally rocked and the Pixies sounded great. After the show, we stood in line to get a CD of the live show we'd just seen.

After the show we headed back down to the strip for a while, stopped for a midnight snack and finally rolled back into the hotel around 2:00am. We slept in the next morning and headed back to Utah. It goes without saying that our road trip was a huge success and for a little while, we felt like we were back in college again. A big thanks to Whitney and M for letting us do it.

Happy Place

2010-10-26T22:02:00.000-07:00

Today was a really strange day. I had to go to my "happy place" four times, and I'm still feeling all out of sorts about it how the day played out.

1. During physical therapy the therapist took a metal device and scraped my foot all over the place. Up until today I wasn't totally clear about all my injuries (and I'm actually still a little confused). It turns out I've got a few fractures in most of my metatarsils and surrounding joints, as well as a few torn liaments, including a really strange "lateral" tear on the side of my foot. I thought I had six fractures, but I've actually got fractures in six areas. The therapist said there are actually too many to count. So when he rubbed around with that metal torture device, it scraped all on sorts of sore areas. I was too busy in my happy place to ask what in the world he was doing but I'll be sure to do that next time. By the way, I had a bone scan yesterday and I've got the beginnings of osteopenia, which puts me at risk of osteoporosis, which is no big surprise considering the number of low-impact injuries I sustained. What's really lame is that I'm young still, so it's not good news really, but it's not horrible news either. I really think this all relates to my infertility. So insufficient hormones are the gift that keep on giving. Who knows really because I also have low vitamin D, and can't stand most dairy products. Plus being a Caucasian women with a family history of osteoporosis. I've learned more about osteoporosis in the past two days than I ever cared to know, that's for sure.

2. Then my physical therapist tried to put one of my joints back into place by whipping my leg in a forceful way. It sort of felt good but it actually really hurt. Then right after, he strapped a block of ice with velcro all around my foot. It hurt so bad, I seriously wondered if it was worse than natural childbirth. (Just kidding Myndi and Tahsha!) Luckily my foot went numb after five minutes. The one good thing that happened was getting to dip my foot in hot paraffin wax. It was heaven in the midst of an otherwise really sucky visit. I asked him if he'd like to give me a pedicure while he was at it, since I REALLY need one but don't trust anyone else to do it with the tenderness of my foot and all. But that was before the torture device and ice episodes, so now I don't trust him either. Not to worry, he wasn't amused by my pedicure request anyway.

3. Then I decided to go to the gym for the first time in almost 11 weeks. I can only ride a bike, do a rowing machine, or lift upper body weights, so I settled on a few weights and a 30 minute bike ride. I can not believe how out of shape I've gotten. I was exhausted after about 10 minutes of the bike ride, but I managed to finish. Wowsers that sucked. And here's what's really lame. I got on a scale for the first time since the injury and was surprised to see I haven't gained a single pound. Clearly I've lost muscle and gained fat, but honestly, if I was working out that hard before... and now I'm not... and my body really hasn't changed that much... why in tarnation am I torturing myself at the gym? I mean, yeah-I feel better when I work out. But seriously I'm thinking it's just not worth the effort! If I had cottage cheese and a muffin top before, and I have one now, conventional wisdom would tell me it's just not worth the trouble. Except now with this osteopenia problem, weights are a requirement to keep my bones as strong as possible. What do you think? I was doing weights religiously before the injury and it didn't seem to help.

4. A couple days ago we finally got around to ordering some books my sister recommended to teach Buddy about the birds and the bees. They arrived today and G and I about died of embarrassment reading through them. The first one is supposedly for children ages 4 and older. But oh.my.gosh. I think I will be removing the page with the mom and dad in bed, with a detailed description of how babies are made. Myndi-are you sure this is OK?????!!!!!!! We are freaking out here because Buddy is super curious and has already learned a few things from friends so we need to be clear with him. But oh mercy, he just seems so incredibly young. And I just feel so incredibly foolish opening up such a big can of worms. Not to mention the awkwardness!!!! Could someone please talk me off a cliff here?!

One This Day

2010-10-22T15:07:00.000-07:00

I was talking to my sister the other day about her new life as a mother of two. Her oldest is quite a handful, and I say that in the most loving way. You see, my oldest was quite a handful too, so I sympathize. Except her situation is harder. After all, I didn't move my "handful" across the country, or have a baby when he was two-and a half years old. Bless my sister's heart. No really, she needs blessings.

Anyway, I was looking at old pictures for a project I am working on. I was curious to see what Buddy looked like at the age Sambo is right now -- on the verge of turning three. Sambo is soooooooooo much easier (and smaller) than Buddy was at this age, it's just unreal. So I scrolled through my pictures looking for Buddy on October 22, 2006.

And this is what I found. Doesn't he just look like a little punk? Cutest little punkface I've ever seen, though. And it was fortunate he was cute because I doubt he would have survived the stage he was in at the time of this picture, if it weren't for that precious face.

Things do get better, Myndi.