Trump or Monkey

Years ago we used to love a David Letterman segment called "Trump or Monkey"  Dave would show a tightly cropped picture of hair, and the lucky contestant would have to decide if it was Donald Trump's hair or a monkey's hair.  It was hilarious and was actually more difficult than it sounds.  The contestants usually got the answer wrong.

We've got our own little Trump or Monkey among us.  We've always struggled to find a decent hairstyle for Sambo, because he's got a square head, a gigantic forehead, and extremely fine hair.  But it wasn't until the other day when I was scrolling through some old photos of him, did I realize just how bad things were at times. 

Unfortunately I didn't get a picture of Sambo at my friend Nicki's house yesterday.  He wanted his hair up in a rubberband like her daughters.  And then he got genuinely mad when I took it out to go to Costco.  Since he already looks like a girl, I figured having his hair in a rubberband would be a bad idea out in public. 

And, not to leave Buddy out... he has crazy hair too.  He actually has really great hair, but it's extremely thick and wavy and is difficult to tame.  He hasn't had a haircut in awhile, and he desperately needs one.  I bribed him to let me take the following picture the other day.  He would be mortified if he knew I was posting it on the www.  He made me promise "I wouldn't show it to any of my friends."  But it's just too awesome not to share.

Crazy hair aside, they are both just adorable!

License to Practice What?

This week my neighbor told me that a conversation she had with Buddy "got her right out of her winter depression."  Buddy is hilarious, I'll admit.  But let me tell you about a situation that got me right out of my winter depression.

As a member of the Oregon State Bar, G is part of a listserve that received an email this week about a continuing education course.  Apparently the listserve had some issues because anytime anyone replied to the email to ask a question about the course or to request they "take me off this list," the reply got sent to everyone.  So over the course of a day, G -- and everyone else on the list -- got approximately 60 emails from people who were irritated they had received the original email. Apparently those same people were not irritated by the 60 followup emails. 

G told me about the situation I seriously doubled over laughing hysterically at all the awesome replies that people sent out.  I found it so incredibly funny... and ironic.

Keep in mind, only members of the Bar received the email, which means these people were smart enough to go to law school, graduate from law school, take the Bar, then pass the Oregon Bar.  So in theory, these people should be smart.

But not smart enough to notice the instructions for unsubscribing at the bottom of the email.

Interestingly enough, the first line of the original email read, "Please share this information widely with your colleagues and networks."

Dear Folks Who Wrote the Original Email:  consider that task done.  And done well.

Let me share with you the awesome replies. G deleted a few of the original ones before I begged him to save them for my enjoyment.  (All typos are from the original emails.)

Please remove me from this mailing list.
I am afraid someone has the wrong email address.
Maybe this will help:  wiki.answers.com/Q/What_is_the_difference_between_reply_and_reply_all
I believe I was sent thid email by mistake.
Please remove me from this list.
Since when do I have a say in CLE credit approval?  Please send only to those concerned. 
Why am I receiving these e-mails?
Remove me from this list please
Please remove me from your list.
Why am I receiving these e-mails?
And it’s on!
Rather than getting a bunch more of these, I would like to point out that instructions on how to remove yourself are at the bottom….
Please remove me from all mailing lists.
Please remove me.
ditto
Remove my email address immediately please.
Anybody want to educate the rest of us, what the hell is going on here?
Please take me off your e-mail list.
Please remove me from this list
Please also remove me from this list immediately.
Out of courtesy for other victims of this list, please direct your unsubscribe requests to the OMA address as I did, not to the entire “list” address, as others have.          
Please remove me from this mailing list.
Please promptly remove me from this list, whatever it is.  Thank you.
I am assigning this list to my junk mail folder.
Why am I receiving these e-mails?
Please remove me too.
Please take me off this list
Please remove me from this list.
I DID NOT send this to anyone.  I received one too.
Please remove my name as well.

At the risk of perpetuating this e-mail once more but in hopes of stopping them from overwhelming everyone’s e-mail inbox, please:Do NOT hit “reply all” to this e-mail.  Your are replying to a list serve address which causes your e-mail to be distributed to everyone on that list.  If you wish to e-mail someone at the bar or the OMA please e-mail them directly; and

If you do not want to receive the e-mails advertising programs from the bar in the future, please use the “unsubscribe” links at the bottom of the original e-mail.  Federal law gives the sender 10 business days to remove you from the list.

This is a Mailman list.  You need to change the following setting so that replies are sent to the administrator of the list only and are not sent to everyone on the list.  Go to the list administration menu.  Choose General Options.  Change the following setting to "Poster". Where are replies to list messages directed? Poster is strongly recommended for most mailing lists.

To everyone on this list:  Please, let's just stop replying to this chain of email.  To anyone who wants to unsubscribe:  Please follow the instructions, which are posted at the bottom of every email.  Please do not just hit Reply.  Thank you.  I am merely offering advice.  I do not in any way control this list.Stop REPLYING PLEASE   

Dear Colleagues:  I respectfully ask that you immediately remove my name from the E-Mail lists which have spawned this unwanted contact.  Thank you for your kind assistance.

Please remove me from this list immediately
Everybody!!  Stop hitting "Reply All" and instead set up a mailbox "rule" to filter the subject line "[oregon_bar]" and set the rule to automatically place all future messages in the trash.
Remove me also
Please stop hitting reply all.
Please remove us as well.
Please remove me from the list.
Please remove me from this/these lists. Much appreciated
Please remove me from this list.    Thank you. 
Why am I getting this? Please remove me from this forward. Thank you
      

Skiing (by G)

We've already shared a few things that we did over spring break. However, one particular event was one of the absolute highlights of the trip. Typically, Reno in spring is usually full of blue skies and sunshine. This time, however, we were met with wind, rain, and snow. We did have a small break in the weather on a Tuesday, so my dad and I loaded up our skis and brought along something that we hadn't ever brought before: Buddy!

I was eight years old when I first started skiing and so I'd been itching to get Buddy up on the hill. My dad was equally excited to have Buddy start. We drove up to Mt. Rose and enrolled him in a two-hour lesson. When we first rented his equipment, we had enough time for one run before we had to eat a quick lunch and get to the lesson. Buddy, true to form, wanted to go down the hill all by himself right from the start. We helped him down the hill and then dropped him off for his lesson.

My dad and I skied in the meantime and got a lot of runs in. My plantar fasciitis was causing my feet to hurt in my ski boots, but I was still having fun. Once the lesson got over, we met Buddy and made a couple more runs with him. The first run was a little rough, but on the second run, he did phenomenal. I can't even begin to describe how much fun it was to see my oldest son cruising down the mountain on skis. Skiing and snowboarding have been a lifelong passion for me and my dad. I'm glad that I can pass that on to Buddy. Unfortunately, because of the weather we weren't able to go again in Reno, but we will definitely go again here.

I Want To Remember These Quirks

Buddy gets a lot of air time on the ol' blog because he says and does a lot of funny stuff.  But this little boy deserves a shout-out too.  I have often said that one of Sambo's talents is being adorable.  He is just so cute, I can hardly stand it.  I could just kiss his cheeks and watch him play all day.  He says the cutest things and those big eyes...  I'm a sucker for this kid and I can't help myself.  He's a handful at times, but he is just so dang cute the rest of the time I quickly forget about his crazy shenanigans.

I really hope I always remember how he is at age 3.  This documentation will help:

• He is a major hypochondriac.  He always thinks he's "sick" and begs -- BEGS -- to go to the doctor, get medicine, or get a bandaid.  A couple days ago he cracked into the children's ibuprofen we left on the bathroom counter and drank the rest of the bottle because he was "sick."  Thank goodness there was only about an ounce in the bottle, so no harm was done.  But that was our first call to Poison Control.  Yesterday I had a dermatologist appointment and as soon as he realized I was going to the doctor he came down with a horrible "illness" too and said he needed to go to the doctor too and he wanted a shot.  (What kid wants a shot?!)  While we were in the waiting room he cuddled up to me and laid in my arms like a little invalid moaning that his tummy hurt "really bad."  All to convince me he needed to see the doctor.  Additionally, my neck has been bothering me so I've been putting a hot rice pack around it throughout the day.  He's jealous of this, so now unfortunately his neck, leg, and tummy all "hurt" too.  So now we have to take turns using the rice pack.
• "Child Proof" means nothing to this kid.  We've thought of changing his name to Houdini because he can get in or out of anything.  (See above with the medicine.)  Luckily he's not terribly curious or we'd have a lot more problems.  He was barely walking when he started climbing out of his crib.  Those door childlocks never have kept him in his room (he had one on his door the morning he drank the medicine).  And it was a year ago that he first started hopping over the large gate at the top of our very steep stairs and climbing out of his 5-point harness carseat.  Today he opened the car door while we were driving for probably the 20th time.  The first time it happened we were on the freeway.  I'm trying to be better about locking the car, although he also knows how to unlock the door. 
• He loves the color orange and especially loves his orange pumpkin socks.  He wears them anytime they are clean.  If I fold and put away the laundry, guaranteed he will find those socks and wear them.  Last night I laid them out with a clean set of clothes for today.  And when I checked on him before I went to bed, they were already on his feet. 
• He loooooooves his big brother.  This week he started saying he "misses" Buddy when he's at school and he says it every day now.  It hurts his feelings if Buddy forgets to kiss him before school and is in a foul mood until Buddy gets home and apologizes. 
• He doesn't need a nap most of the time, but if he does go to sleep he wakes up in a really bad mood.  It's not at all worth it.  
• He falls asleep super easily in the car and if he naps in the car, he doesn't wake up in a bad mood.
• He is fiercely independent.  In his mind, life has to be fair.  If Buddy gets to do something he doesn't or can't, then all hell breaks loose.  As long as I let him do things himself and do things Buddy gets to do, he is almost always extremely happy and pleasant to be around.  If not, oh boy.  Watch out.  (As an oldest child myself, I know this is extremely annoying.  Luckily Buddy doesn't seem to mind at all.)
• His best friends are Connor and of course, Buddy.  He would play with Connor every day if I'd arrange it.
• He'll do pretty much anything I ask of him in order to get the amazing privilege of opening the garage door.  I can motivate him to hurry and get his coat and shoes on when we need to go somewhere, if I let him push the button to open the garage.
• He loves to sing.  Even if he doesn't know the words, he belts out his own words.  ADORABLE.  You should hear him during sacrament meeting.  Oh man I hope he never stops singing like that.
• He also loves to color and do "homework" like his brother.  I'd estimate he spends three hours a day on average coloring and doing homework sheets.  He loves it.  If I'm doing something on the couch, he cuddles next to me with his blanket on his lap and his workbook.  When I get ready in the morning he brings a workbook into the bathroom.  His interest is very much art, though, and not academics.  He's the first artist in our family, so I'm totally fine with that. 
• He uses the word "no" generously.  He does not do what he doesn't want to do.  Period.  Unless you motivate him with the garage door, or some other equally exciting activity that makes him feel like he's a big boy.  And then he's the most agreeable child in the world.
• He eats yogurt almost every day for lunch.
• Whenever I give myself a treat, he asks me why I "need" it.  (Buddy told him a few weeks ago that I deserve treats.)  So now I've got my own personal food police.  It's awfully hard to explain to a 3-year old why a mother would NEED a treat.
• Even though I've got almost endless patience for this child, he likes G a LOT more than he likes me.  It makes no sense and is starting to make me mad actually.  Oh well, I can't stay mad at him for very long. 

Date Night

While in Reno, G and I kicked up our heels and went out just the two of us a few times. 

One of the dates in particular was one of the best we've had in our years of marriage.  We started out spending and hour or so shopping at an outdoor shopping mall.  A snowstorm was starting, so we were pretty much the only people there.  Then we headed over to Grimaldi's, or very favorite pizza place.  Again, the weather probably contributed, but we were almost the only people there so we got our food quickly.  A far cry from the couple-hour wait we had when we went for the first time in New York.  Our waiter was impressed at how quickly we polished off a large pizza.  And that we had been to the original Grimaldi's.  In fact, when we were done we were craving more and we were "this close" to ordering another one.  We found out that they oxidize their water to be just like Brooklyn's water, and they use the same ingredients as they do in New York, so the pizza is exactly the same.  Heavenly, I tell you.

We had scheduled ourselves quite awhile for dinner, so we had a long time to spare, so we figured we'd wander around the El Dorado casino, before picking up our tickets to the "Buddy Holly" show.  They have free valet parking there, so we enjoyed that nice convenience!  When we got into the casino we found the sports bar to watch the final minutes of the BYU//Florida game.  When we arrived about 40 TV's were tuned to another game, and one lonely TV was tuned to the BYU game.  But when the game went to overtime they put the game onto the big screen.  G and I figured we were probably the only two BYU fans watching from a bar.  But actually quite a few other folks around us were cheering the Cougs on too.  The difference was they were drunk off their rears and were clutching worn papers.  Presumably their March Madness brackets.  So we were the only true* BYU fans/grads there.  Unless a whole bunch of folks became drunks since graduation.  We also remarked at the irony and awkwardness of the repeated f-bombs we heard all around as as Jimmer missed like ten 3-pointers in a row, and BYU ultimately lost.

*We're not true fans either.  This was the only game we anticipated or watched all season.  We care enormously when they win but we don't really watch them play.  Or watch any sports  for that matter.

So after we got over being sad about the loss, we headed for the theater to watch the show.  As awkward as the sports bar was, we cannot express how hilariously awkward it was to walk up to the theater only to realize we were at least 40 years younger than the next youngest person there.  Apparently Buddy Holly fans are in their 70's or older.  Seeing how he was the rage in the late 50's, I guess that would make sense.

This is the worst picture ever, but I wanted you to get a sense of what I mean when I say we stuck out like a sore thumb.

The performance was fabulous, fun, and entertaining.  The actor playing Buddy Holly was great, and boy did the folks in the audience get excited about the music.  They danced and hollered like a bunch of teenagers.  G's parents went a few nights later and said they had a frail 80-pound lady near them that moved the entire time.  Ken said that if she had osteoporosis she would have resulted in a pile of dust by the end.  The two people on either side of us were toe-tapping, clapping, and singing the entire time.  It was so incredibly entertaining to feel the enthusiasm of the crowd.

At one point there was a costume malfunction for one of the guys on stage (his pants came unbuttoned) and the lady next to me about came unglued.  Like a teenager if Justin Beiber's pants came unbuttoned on stage.  She laughed and blushed and leaned over to me and asked me if I saw what happened.  We saw her later after the show in the lobby and she was still laughing and blushing like a little school girl.  She flagged me down and asked me yet again (for the 10th time) if I saw it.

When we sat down we noticed there were some extra large seats right behind us.  They were special seats for people on oxygen we discovered a few minutes later -- when several people rolled their oxygen tanks in.  Not to mention, there was Jazzy parking near the entrance of the theater.  I'm not kidding. 

To say we had a fabulous time would be a huge understatement.  We were so glad we went!

The show ended by 8:30, which is early by our standards and by Reno's.  We wanted to make sure the children were good and asleep before we arrived back, so we decided to drive around the strip, then head out for dessert.  Unfortunately the snow was really coming down, so a few of the restaurants we looked into were closing early, so we found Applebees and totally overdid it on some appetizers before finally going home.

I mentioned in an earlier post how great it is to be able to go out without paying a babysitter or having to clean up after the babysitter.  It was so nice to get out and know the boys were fine (even if the grandparents were a little worse for the wear.)

7-Up Incident

Today I got a message from Buddy's teacher that said, "Hi.  I'm calling because we had a little incident at school today with Buddy.  He has been the model student for the past month, ever since we last talked.  I've implemented several of our ideas and they are totally working.  Except today he's been really off.  It wasn't a huge deal, but I thought I should let you know because he'll probably come home upset.  He was goofing off during work time and I had to talk to him sternly twice because he was trying to get his friends to laugh and just wouldn't stop.  He eventually did and apologized and everything is great.  Just wanted you to know."

I wasn't too shook up about it, but I did find odd, as did the teacher, that he would act out today.  For the next few minutes before Buddy got home I was reviewing what could have possibly set him off today.

When he came home he told me about what happened right away, and I praised him profusely for his honesty.  He said the kids thought he was really funny and he just couldn't stop himself from goofing off.  Then he said he was absolutely starving and needed a big snack. 

As he helped himself to a snack, I asked him if he'd eaten his lunch today since he was so hungry.  (He has only not eaten his lunch one other time this year.)  He said he couldn't finish it because... "OH MY GOSH, MOM!  DAD GAVE ME SODA IN MY WATER BOTTLE TODAY!"

I noticed G putting soda (10 ounces to be exact) in his water bottle last night and cautioned him that I thought it was a bad idea.  Every time he makes Buddy's lunch, he always puts a surprise in there.  Usually a note as well as a small treat of some kind.  Today he decided soda would be a good/fun idea.  Everybody knows Buddy does not need soda.  "Have you met our son?"

"Buddy, when did you get in trouble today?  Was it before or after lunch?" 

"After," he said. 

I immediately emailed Buddy's father and strongly encouraged him to use better judgment next time he packs the lunch.

P.S.  Speaking of school lunches, check out this blog.  It's one of G's college friends.  We think he is really clever and has been the inspiration for G's "fun" lunches.